


Fragile Feasting

by harpingjay



Category: Pennywise - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Minor Spoilers, Other, Possibly non-con sex, The Losers Club, highkey sexual violence, non-canon pennywise, pennywise with feelings, somewhat slow build
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-17
Updated: 2017-10-08
Packaged: 2018-12-30 16:51:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 33,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12113055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harpingjay/pseuds/harpingjay
Summary: Vera ventures down the well in pursuit of fear and adrenaline, and is not disappointed when she meets a certain dark clown.





	1. Down the Rabbit Hole

**Author's Note:**

> Non-canon. Pennywise is male for the most part. He’s also more mature; I like the idea that the clown is purely for children so he can be a little darker with adults. He can also feel emotions altogether – not just fear.
> 
> It’s my first fanfic, so I’m not really sure how to tag it. If it’s well enough liked, I may write more. I’m currently going through a Pennywise trash phase (thanks Bill) so I need to get it out.

“Why, hello there.”  
The voice came from the dark cave-like room you’d finally managed to find. You’d come a long way to the small, infamous town of Derry. You’d always had a love for the dark and mysterious, and your curious little mind couldn’t help but be drawn to the stories. You had to see if they were true.  
And true they were. You’d ventured from the tiny inn just outside of town to the derelict, misshapen excuse for a house, so left of centre in the place untouched by time. Upon seeing the house, you’d thought the stories were made up by the wild imagination of people afraid of its horrific aesthetic. But the further you ventured in, the thicker the air became.  
Is this what fear feels like to others? The thought had wandered into your head. It had been a long time since you felt fear. It hadn’t plagued you since… since you’d extinguished the thing that fanned the flames for you.  
Down you had spun, into the well in the basement. Through the dank sewers you had trudged, excited, anticipating confrontation at any moment. You followed the hastily marked path on your map of the sewer, right to the heart.  
And here you were.  
The thing you had come searching for was on the ground, leaning against an opening that lead down further still into the darkness below. It seemed tired. Exhausted. Like something had drained it. Though its energy was low, it still seeped about, making the air stagnant.  
“Now, what could a pretty little thing like you be doing down in a place like this?” The creature rose to his feet. Taller than you’d imagined – at least 7 feet. Though it lacked a certain grace its movements hinted at, you couldn’t help but be a little taken with the sinister liquidity that each stride toward you possessed.  
You did not move as it approached. You did not speak. You looked over to your right and noticed a smaller house there, big enough for maybe a bedroom or 2, but nothing more.  
It stopped inches from you. Leaned down. Iridescent yellow eyes met your icy blue. When it spoke, you could smell cotton candy.  
“My name is Pennywise. Pennywise the Dancing Clown.” Pennywise twirled. The voice was masculine, but was it male? You had to assume so. “What’s yours?”  
The question was innocent enough, especially considering you had come here of your own accord. Pennywise was oozing juvenile curiosity, but it was razor-edged with a dark underlay that threatened to snuff you out if you made one wrong move.  
And yet you still did not fear.  
“My name is Vera.”  
He tilted his massive head. “Such a fitting name for a pretty girl.” A large, gloved hand wound its fingers in your mahogany locks. Tighter. Tighter. Too tight. It began to hurt.  
His face came even closer, the next words a snarl. “And what do you think you’re doing in this dark place? Did you come looking for me? Why ever would you do that? Are you in need of a little dancing show? Or did you want a taste of real fear?” His eyes grew brighter, his snarl widened, and then –  
Nothing. The light in his eyes momentarily dimmed, before flaring up again, this time in a mixture of anger and awe.  
“You don’t fear me?” His nose grazed yours.  
“No.” You were disappointed. Not in Pennywise; he was every bit as magnificent and dreadful as you had hoped. You were disappointed in yourself. In all your adrenaline seeking since the incident, you had yet to feel fear again. This seemed like your last resort. “But I wanted to,” you added softly.  
The lights dimmed again. He released your hair, and stepped closer, forcing you to step back. It was a small admission, yet filled with power. This was his place; he might be starving and weak, but he was much stronger than you.  
Why weren’t you afraid?  
“You wanted to?” he growled. His hand snaked around your waist and pulled you up against him. With one arm, he lifted you up and buried his nose into your neck, inhaling deeply. Snarling in frustration, he set you down again, gently, and paced.  
Visions danced before you. Mummies, sharks, snakes, spiders, zombies, ghosts, demons, all of them, but nothing made you afraid. Nothing.  
Pennywise hunched over you, the lights in his eyes almost blinding. You could feel him rifling through any fear you had ever had, searching for a foothold, something he could feast on. He was gaining no traction, nothing, until –  
“Ah,” he breathed. The lights finally died. “No wonder.”  
He walked away from you and crouched up like a gargoyle. “Do you know why I like children, Vera? Their fears are easy to manifest, and the feeling is so much stronger. Less rational. Easy prey.” He tapped his temple. “Adults have fears that are much more complex. You are not afraid of anything palpable. I cannot BE your fear – but I can still make you fear.”  
There was a momentary whoosh of air swirling around you, and you were inside the house in the corner of his sewer, inside, like you had suspected, a bedroom. Too small. Pennywise towered over you. He approached you much faster than you did before. You instinctively backed up, hitting the wall. And he was against you. All of you.  
“Unafraid of men, but fearing what they can DO to you. What they have DONE. Afraid not of the perpetrators, but the act itself. How exquisite, a gourmet dish for me. Generous of you to come so willingly.”  
You had underestimated him, and now, you were afraid. You remembered the men who had taken you into an alley and had your body against your will, and you feared.  
Pennywise buried his face in your neck again, this time growling in hunger as he breathed in your fear. He ran his tongue along your ear. It was cold and wet, and impossibly long. His entire body pressed against yours, invasive and unwelcome.  
You were again reminded of the men who had taken from you what was no theirs to take, and you were afraid. And you relished every minute. The racing heart, the pounding in your head, the blur in your vision and the rush in your veins – you adored every second of the adrenaline pumping through you. This is what you sought when you came looking for Pennywise, and by god had he delivered.  
He pulled back and put a hand under your chin. He gripped firmly and forced your head back, gazing into your eyes.  
“Isn’t this just lovely,” he smirked. “You waltz in here like a meal on wheels, you get scared, I feed, all in a day’s work for –” Suddenly, his eyes rolled back into his head and he began trembling. His grip on you tightened and began to ache on your jaw. Very abruptly, you were aware of a rigid body part pressed up against you that was not there moments ago.  
He stilled. “What’s this?” he breathed into your face, scrutinizing you. “Are you… enjoying this?”  
You gulped. It had been a long time since you’d felt this alive. You didn’t respond – you were having trouble thinking. You didn’t think you would have much success forming words and then speaking them.  
Pennywise snarled and shoved his thigh between your legs. Delicious licks of terror shot through your body, and you shuddered. He lowered himself so he was eye level with you, and spoke very softly.  
“Hunger makes me crave fear. Your fear tastes… different. It’s laced with satisfaction, tinged with pleasure.” He ran his thumb along your cheekbone. “How extraordinary, to crave your own fear completely. It makes me hunger – in a way I have not for centuries.”  
Wait – what? “Hunger in what way?” you squeaked out. He sneered that malicious smile you’d heard so much about, toying with the buttons on your shirt.  
“You see, Vera, children may be easier to manipulate, but you are unique, unheard of. To come here seeking fear and adrenaline, and to enjoy it… well, your fear is more potent and you willingly give it to me. I could feast on you for years, and that’s just your fear alone…” His eyes trailed down to your heaving chest, and a string of saliva fell from his mouth and pooled between your breasts. “Imagine what I could do with the rest of you.”  
You looked up at him in disbelief. “You… you can do that?”  
“Do what?” he asked mercilessly. “Rip your clothes off and ravage your body until there’s nothing left but a broken shell, wrecked and horrified? Yes, I think I can do that. I think I’d enjoy it.”  
You were terrified. “But...” you swallowed thickly. His gaze followed your throat as you did, and more drool leaked from his mouth. “Why would you want to? You aren’t even human! Why would you even look at me and want that?”  
He feigned hurt and backed away. “Don’t you think I have feelings, Vera? I may not be human, but a man has his needs. How lucky I must be to have you traipse on down here like it’s a merry vacation to be had.” When you didn’t respond, he huffed. “I haven’t wanted to in a long time. Perhaps you won’t understand. But encountering someone who enjoys fear as much as I do, in however a different form… I want to lock you up. I’ll keep you alive, in a constant state of fear and bliss, and I will feed off you until those children from my last awakening die, perhaps longer. You will be my rise to victory. Whether you want to be or not.” His voice had grown throatier and deeper with each breath, and as if he were stealing yours, you became breathless. You didn’t want to pity him, but you did. You weren’t sure what he was or why he craved the things he did, but surely it wasn’t his fault? No one would choose to have to live on such an arbitrary substance, right?  
Over the other side of the small room, Pennywise tilted his large head. “Oh, you are a peculiarity, aren’t you?”  
For a moment, you stared at each other. You felt an odd kinship with him, craving something that other would not approve of. You were still afraid, but you wanted to understand him. And if he was planning to lock you up and use you for his needs… you’d have plenty of time to work on that. Gathering up your courage, you moved to the big bed that seemed out of place in the small room. You wanted more fear. It was like you were an addict who’d had her first hit of heroin in a week. Ecstasy.  
Slowly, you looked up at Pennywise. He was watching you curiously, no doubt tasting your feelings as they sifted throughout your body. You patted the bed beside you with one shaky hand, and to your utter surprise, he came and sat beside you. You looked at his mouth. The two front teeth were significantly larger than the rest, but at least he’d stopped drooling. They were redder than blood, and you found yourself wondering if it was paint or if he really looked like that.  
Shakily, you raised the same hand and touched his lower lip. You looked at your fingers, but it hadn’t smudged. Was he really coloured like that, after all?  
Apparently, that had driven him over. He grabbed fistfuls of your hair and mashed his face against yours. Before you had a chance to react, his hand snaked around the back of your neck, guiding it back to allow his tongue better access. You… didn’t want this. But you did? You were confused. But you kissed back. It felt like… like kissing your ex-boyfriend. Normal. Warm. Wet. And… good. Really good. You weren’t sure how you felt about that.  
All too soon, it was over. Pennywise shoved you away with enough force that it hurt. His eyes were ablaze with anger. He stood up and towered over you, inexplicably furious.  
“What are you doing here? And what the fuck was that!” It wasn’t a question. You felt small and fragile, but you were confused enough to speak.  
“I… what? You kissed me! You can’t do that and expect me to not kiss back!” You were flushed and embarrassed and to your horror, aroused.  
He got right up in your face and snarled. “I’ll be back for you, little angel.” The words were sweet but the promise was not. He left the room, slamming the door hard enough the shake the house. You heard a lock click. You lay back on the bed, trying to make sense of it all. That he was real, that he’d made you fear, that he’d kissed you, but most importantly, why in the fuck you had liked it.


	2. Perverse and Pleased

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pennywise relieves his tension to an unwary display.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still have no clue what I'm doing. More to come. Clown fucking is coming soon, my dudes. I need it. You need it. We all need it.

~Pennywise POV~

 

“Hunger makes me crave fear. Your fear tastes… different. It’s laced with satisfaction, tinged with pleasure.” I ran my thumb along her cheekbone, relishing how fragile she felt. “How extraordinary, to crave your own fear completely. It makes me hunger – in a way I have not for centuries.” My thigh was still firmly pressed between hers. She was soft and malleable, and I wanted to shape her.  
She looked at me, alarmed. “Hunger in what way?” she squeaked out. I smirked, toying with the buttons on her shirt, enjoying the brief glimpses of the swell of her breast beneath. They were full, and I wanted to squeeze them. I wanted to watch them rupture beneath my hands and feel her life bleed out onto me.  
“You see, Vera, children may be easier to manipulate, but you are unique, unheard of. To come here seeking fear and adrenaline, and to enjoy it… well, your fear is more potent and you willingly give it to me. I could feast on you for years, and that’s just your fear alone…” I let my eyes trailed down to her heaving chest, and a string of saliva dripped from my mouth and pooled between her breasts. I wanted to drive my tongue between them and lick it back up. “Imagine what I could do with the rest of you.”  
She was confused. “You… you can do that?”  
“Do what?” I asked coldly. “Rip your clothes off and ravage your body until there’s nothing left but a broken shell, wrecked and horrified?” Just the thought was intoxicating. I wanted to play with her first, but it was difficult not to begin right then and there. “Yes, I think I can do that. I think I’d enjoy it.”  
Her fear thickened. It swirled around me, ripe and luscious. She spoke anyway. She was courageous. “But...” she swallowed thickly. I watched her throat contract, and more drool seeped past my lips. “Why would you want to? You aren’t even human! Why would you even look at me and want that?”  
I pulled an expression of mock hurt and paced a short distance from her. Not only was I hungry, I was playful, and aroused. “Don’t you think I have feelings, Vera? I may not be human, but a man has his needs. How lucky I must be to have you traipse on down here like it’s a merry vacation to be had.” She didn’t respond, and I sighed. Humans were so stupid. “I haven’t wanted to in a long time. Perhaps you won’t understand. But encountering someone who enjoys fear as much as I do, in however a different form… I want to lock you up. I’ll keep you alive, in a constant state of fear and bliss, and I will feed off you until those children from my last awakening die, perhaps longer. You will be my rise to victory. Whether you want to be or not.” As the words came out, I could picture it. I would have my place terrorising this town again. And she would be the fuel.  
I felt an odd emotion radiating from her. Was that… compassion? Pity? She was one oddity after another. I tilted my head to the side, wondering briefly what could ever possess her to feel compassion for me. I was a monster who quite literally at children. And I liked it.  
“Oh, you are a peculiarity, aren’t you?”  
I watched curiously as she made her way to the only piece of furniture in this room. She was small, but when she sat on the bed, she looked smaller still. Her skin was white, but unlike mine, she had a natural rosy glow. Mahogany hair and icy eyes were a combination I found pleasing. The pretty ones always tasted the best. What was it that the humans said? You eat with your eyes.  
She beckoned me over. I considered sneering, but I wanted to see what she would do. I was oddly drawn to her, no doubt from her perverse affliction. So, I sat beside her, and she looked at me with her big, doe eyes. She gazed at my mouth, but she wasn’t horrified by it like everyone else I had encountered. She seemed more inquisitive.  
Then she shocked me. She willingly raised her hand and touched my lip. She pulled her hand away and looked at it, as if expecting the colour to stain her. Little did she know I could take on any form I wished, I was just partial to the clown. He instilled a specific kind of fear in my victims, one I savored the most.  
She looked up at me, and I decided, fuck it. I’ll do what I want.  
I tangled my hands in her hair and shoved my lips onto hers. She made the tiniest gasp, and I used this to tip her head back and assault her mouth with my tongue. Her fear was rearing its ugly head again, accompanied by the tagalong pleasure, and it was incredible.  
Then she began kissing me back. I was not one easily surprised, but she kept doing it as if it were nothing to her. She tentatively pushed her tongue against mine and for the first time in my long, long life I felt – I felt –  
I violently shoved her away from me. She looked up at me in confusion, but before she could open her stupid, inviting little mouth I got up and glared at her.  
“What are you doing here? And what the fuck was that!” It wasn’t a question. She recoiled, confused, but I tasted indignance in her as well. Her skin flushed rosier, and I wanted to rip it off her face with my teeth.  
“I… what? You kissed me! You can’t do that and expect me to not kiss back!”  
I leaned down, resisting the urge to snap her tiny brittle neck and shut her up for good. “I’ll be back for you, little angel.” The words were sweet but the promise was not. I left the room and slammed the door, feeling the house rattle. I locked it with a chain and padlock. She was not getting away any time soon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was RAVENOUS. It was driving me insane. All I could smell was her delicious fright in the next room over, the sweet underlying pleasure she gained from it. All I could taste was her tongue, sweet and salty, making me crave the human body in a way that I had not for longer than I deigned to remember. The fear, the arousal, the shock, the girl, the GIRL –  
I punched the wall. Saliva was falling freely from my mouth, staining the already filthy floor. How badly I wanted to go in there and snap every bone in her breakable body while I fucked her into the carpet. How badly I wanted to bruise that iridescent skin and mark it as mine. Others probably had. No one ever would again. She would be mine to savor, to hurt, to maim, and eventually, to kill. She would float like the rest of them, a queen victim-of-victims, the one to outshine – or outfloat, rather – them all.  
I went outside and rifled through the many things I had accumulated over the centuries of prowling I had done. When I found what I wanted, I stormed back into her room. She had not moved from the bed.  
I dumped the small collection of things I’d found onto the floor. I shoved the bed against the wall so there was more space. I would venture above ground for the rest. If she was to stay here, she needed human things. I would not have her waste away in any way other than by my violence. I then left again, locking the door behind me. The brat could move it herself. I was done for the day.  
I would need to feed, soon. She had escalated my appetite by a long shot. I returned to the room adjacent to hers, realizing the wall I had struck had cracked. Beyond the film of wallpaper, I could see into the room that was now hers. At least here I could watch her without her seeing me.  
She was moving the furniture I’d tossed at her. Her jeans were dirty and wet, making her task harder than it needed to be. She seemed to realize this, and with a sigh, shimmied out of them. This did not help my state of mind.  
Her legs were slender and impossibly long, as pale as the moon. Small muscles flexed as she dragged a dresser into a corner of the room. I watched as she arranged it in some sort of homey semblance, then settle on the bed, tired. The furniture was heavy, and she was only small.  
She ran her hands through her long hair, and I wanted to yank it. I was about to leave to find a child to feed on, but she did something unexpected. Something sexy.  
She unbuttoned her shirt and removed her bra. She ran her hands over her breasts, and I knew where this was going. I couldn’t look away.  
Her willowy hands ran down the soft planes of her stomach, and one came to rest between her thighs. She moved her hand slowly, small sounds escaping her throat. Was it the kiss that had made her like this?  
Her hand moved faster, cupping the small space between her legs, the other hand on her breast. Her body began to move in synch. I could clearly hear moans coming from her, and I was suddenly starving again. I unbuttoned my pants and grasped my cock, and slowly began pumping. I hiss of air escaped my lips as I finally began to relieve some of the tension the bitch had caused.  
Her face, though I could only just see it, was twisting with desire. She paused to remove her underwear, and continued her assault. This time, her fingers slipped inside, and her free had tightened upon the pillow under her head. I began pumping faster, resisting the urge to close my eyes. I wanted to see this.  
She moved. She sat up and positioned the pillow beneath her, funnily enough, facing the wall I was watching her from. I could see her entire body, and I was again struck with the urge to spoil it. I jerked harder, feeling my cock throb as I imagined raking my claws along that unmarred skin, striking her face and biting into her fragile membrane. She leaned forward and rocked on the pillow. Her hair was a mess, her breathing was coming in short. She was close. I had to get this over with.  
She rode the pillow ferociously, and I saw her throw her head back as waves of ecstasy rolled through her. I could feel it. I pumped harder and harder, not caring anymore. She heard me, and looked over, her eyes connecting with mine as horror and embarrassment washed over her. Relishing her roller coaster of emotions, I finally let loose onto the wall in front of me. I panted, not taking my eyes off of her. Smiling wickedly, I buttoned my pants up and left, my hunger once again at the forefront of my desires.


	3. Pennywise the Dancing Clown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera reminisces and finds a hidden treasure in the mountain of spoils Pennywise had accumulated from his hunting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be references to songs in this chapter! Here they are linked below. I highly recommend you listen as you read the parts they are featured in. It really sets the mood.
> 
> For the Damaged Coda - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Js-XbNj6Tk  
> \- yeah i'm a sucker for rick and morty too, prolly gonna write a fic about rick too eventually
> 
> Eyes on fire - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZgqrhznTVg
> 
> ***IMPORTANT NOTE***  
> Next chapter and forward from there, Vera will be from first person, not second. I keep slipping into first person and not realising it. Then I have to go back and change it all. I'm just going to do it like that from now on. I apologise for the inconsistencies. I rarely write in second person, and the unfamiliarity is fucking with my wording. Much love <3

~Vera POV~

You sat on the bed, beyond mortified. As if it weren’t bad enough that you’d been turned on by a (let’s face it) grotesque-looking clown, not only had you got off to the thought of fucking him, but he had SEEN. And judging by the sounds you’d heard, he’d done something along the same lines.  
You rubbed your eyes furiously. How had you missed a damn hole in the wall? How had you missed GLOWY YELLOW EYES watching you? Sighing, you put your shirt and underwear back on, and your shoes. Your jeans were still soaked. No sunlight in this clammy place to dry them for you.  
Pennywise had left. You were very quickly bored. You still had your backpack full of items but somehow, you’d expected to have left not too long after arriving. There was nothing in there to entertain you. Sighing, you tested the door. It was locked with a padlock and chain but – not tightly? You could actually squeeze through the space between the door and the frame. Malicious and terrifying (and strangely sexy) Pennywise may be, but he probably had very little experience keeping prisoners who weren’t “floating” as he liked to call it. You had not seen anyone floating when you made your way down here. Perhaps they disappeared after a time. He did eat them, after all.  
You made your way past the other room, your cheeks flaming, to the front door. Out you ventured, and realised he had not shut the giant sewer grate that would trap you in here. If you wanted to leave, you could.  
You didn’t want to.  
You couldn’t quite explain it, but you were so taken with the ugly, nasty clown that wanted to quite possibly eat you one day. You wanted so badly to understand the nature behind him. You’d heard he could take on the form of any fear. Maybe it went further than that. And even if it didn’t; why the clown? It was certainly frightening to look at. You didn’t imagine he would have an easy time drawing children in.  
You opened the pack of cigarettes you’d brought with you. Thank fuck it was a brand-new pack. You were already going to have to suffer the withdrawals of caffeine now you didn’t have a coffee brewer. You weren’t ready to go through the same with nicotine.  
You lit up, enjoying the ashy taste as the toxic smoke filled your mouth, wondering exactly what I was that you’d done that had angered Pennywise. You sat on the old, padded rocking chair on the porch, gazing upon the wreckage before you. Mountains on mountains of children’s toys, some misshapen furniture, and some items belonging to adults here and there. And a boat. A little paper boat, coated with some substance to prevent it from wilting in the water. S.S Georgie. You drew your legs up beneath you, frowning. That was the boy that had spurred the dancing clown’s defeat. You felt bad for the boy, but you felt even more sorry for Pennywise.  
It can’t have been easy, living on something so fickle. You imagined it was tough work, trying to keep someone in a constant state of terror. You knew many people would have you admitted for even entertaining compassion for a child eating monster, but you had never really been normal. You couldn’t help but pity Pennywise. Living in a musty sewer with nothing but his own thoughts. It must have been miserable.  
You got up, wanting to explore the masses of things he had accrued. Tricycles, chess pieces, shoes, hair bows, dresses, dolls – and a yellow raincoat. It was small. Child sized. Again, you were met with a mix of sadness and anger. The poor child didn’t deserve to die, but how else was Pennywise to live? No one hated lions for eating antelope.  
You’d lost interest. You sat back down on the decrepit chair, praying it didn’t break on you. You sat there, wondering what he was doing. If he was eating right now. How fear tasted to him. How yours was different, as he said. Fear was exhilarating to you. If it was enough to make the giant guy want to fuck, then you imagined it must be beyond incredible to him.  
As you mused, a single, bright red balloon wafted over to you. It was astonishingly bright in the cool grey colour scheme that permeated the damp sewer. You caught it, not having moved from your seat, and your eyes darted around the room. No sign of Pennywise. You took one last puff from your cigarette, and you noticed the top of his head poking out of the sewer pipe leading to the outside world. Locking eyes with him, you used your cigarette to pop the balloon, then flicked the butt into some nearby water.  
You weren’t sure exactly why you did it, but you felt like it might taunt him. You weren’t sure why you’d want to do that, either. But you did.  
He prowled toward you, then sat on the damp ground, crossing his legs beneath him. His mannerism was more childish. He seemed brighter. “How did you get out?”  
You were already exasperated. You lit another cigarette. You had a feeling you’d need it. “You locked the chain well enough, but it was loose. I fit through it.” He frowned and you laughed. Loudly. You couldn’t stop. The idea that his grand plan of keeping you as his prisoner had been foiled but such a small yet obvious detail was hysterical to you. Tears streamed down your face and your stomach began to hurt. You were doing that weird thing where you laugh so hard you can’t actually get enough air into your lungs. Your head began to spin and you leaned back against the chair.  
“Fuck me sideways,” you mumbled. “For all of your magnificent horror, Pennywise, it seems captives are not your calling.”  
He was watching you curiously. Apparently, your display was unexpected. “Why did you stay?”  
You tossed your long locks over your shoulder and his eyes focussed in on your exposed neck. “What, in this lovely location? Couldn’t bring myself to leave. The constant dampness and smell of mould really keeps the place alive, ya know? That and the constant reminders of all the people you’ve eaten,” you went on with a fake shudder of awe, gesturing to the mountain of possessions. “Really calls to a girl’s peaceful soul.”  
He bared his teeth. “You’re not as funny as you think you are, Vera.” He spat your name like it tasted filthy in his mouth.  
You shrugged. “I like it here. Don’t ask me why. I don’t know myself. Sure, you’re scary, but you’re doable.” He cocked an eyebrow at you, a small smirk on his lips. “What – oh jeez, not like that,” you whined, feeling the heat rising to my cheeks.  
“Your little performance before belies your words, little angel. Normally I’m the one performing for others. How thoughtful of you to take the burden instead.”  
“Yeah, well it wasn’t exactly a show, asshole. I didn’t know you could see me.”  
The smirk deepened. “I wouldn’t be embarrassed.” He walked over to you and crouched before you, far too close to your face. His eyes looked at your mouth. “It makes it all the easier for me to picture what it will be like when I have you myself.” His lips were brushing yours oh so lightly, and your heart was racing. Though you were certain he’d just eaten, he still smelled like cotton candy. Then he backed off and brought something back into the sewer.  
Water. Bottles of water. An esky, a bunch of food, and some tools to light a fire. God, you were going to have to cook over a fire if you wanted to eat. Wonderful.  
You walked over and looked up at him. “How the fuck did you get all that without someone in town shooting you?”  
He looked at you like you were an insect. “I can take any form I want. I just walked in looking like a normal human.”  
You were intrigued. “Show me.”  
He leaned down. “No. I like this form.” He thumbed your chin. “And so do you.” His large hand trailed down your neck, over your chest and came to rest on your stomach. The contact was frightening you, as did any form of physical intimacy. You knew he could feel it.  
He released you. “Eat. I can feel your hunger. It’s annoying.” He made his way to the chair you occupied moments ago and sat, scrutinizing your pack of cigarettes. “Why do you smoke these?”  
You smiled sullenly at the packages you were opening. “I’m an addict. Why do you think I came looking for you?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Considering it was a botched job, the meat you’d cooked tasted alright. You were certainly full. And you didn’t hate the taste. The whole time you’d eaten, Pennywise had a slight look of distaste, like it was gross to him. Eventually you’d grown irate and quipped, “You can’t say shit, at least my food is dead.” He didn’t respond.  
You were back to rifling through his spoils. No matter what you removed, it all stayed in place, defying physics. Digging in further, you were astonished to see a piano. A full-sized grand piano, wet, but in working order.  
“What in the world – how did you get this down here? And why?”  
Pennywise had taken one of your precious few cigarettes and was smoking it. “I wanted it. There are large entrances to the sewer. Not that that matters. I’m not human. I can teleport.” He shook a gloved finger at you mockingly. “Don’t you remember being out here one moment, and in there the next?” He gestured to the house, a childish giggle escaping his mouth. You turned away and rolled your eyes. You wondered why he wasn’t trying to frighten you. Maybe his hunger – in all forms – was satiated for today? Who knew.  
You dragged it out. It took a long time, and you grew frustrated with the 7-foot man-creature just WATCHING you struggle, but you did it. there was no stool, but you found some old crates and made do with that. You played a few scales, secretly overjoyed it was here. You’d played as a child, and had recently taken it up again as a hobby. You let your hands rest, then began playing For the Damaged Coda by Blonde Redhead. It was dark and depressing, much like the place you were in, but it was beautiful. It was a shame there were no drums in the background, or women humming hauntingly to ramp up the feel, but the piano did a decent job on its own.  
Your fingers moved smoothly along the keys, and unbeknownst to you, Pennywise rose and move to you. You didn’t notice until he’d crouched on the floor beside you, like a gargoyle, and watched your hands with childlike curiosity, his eyes wide and receptive. He was drooling again, but it was becoming endearing to you. His eyes flicked from you to your hands, then shut, then repeated. You weren’t sure what it was that had him so intrigued, but you didn’t stop.  
The song finished, and you looked down at him. His head was bowed forward, and his eyes were raised, looking at you in a disturbing fashion. A large smile crept across his face, and he began clapping, slowly and loudly. “She performs again.” His voice was low and guttural, a mix of a whisper and a growl. It made your insides crawl.  
He grabbed your hand and made you stand. He twirled you around in a sort of pseudo dance momentarily and sat you back down. “Again.” You looked at him, a little confused. His eyes were aglow and his breathing was slightly labored. But you did as you were asked. As you made the music sing again, Pennywise danced about the room, with an imaginary partner. As comical as you may have found it once, the giant, frightening clown in his dirty circus clothes with ruffles twisting around was… strangely hypnotic. He moved with a viscous grace, never mistaking his footing, never missing a beat. The juxtaposition of the melancholy song paired with his cheery dance struck you in a way you could not explain, but in that moment, you were taken. You were mesmerised by the bizarre creature before you, taking joy in one of the smallest pleasures in life.  
As the song came to its imperfect cadence once more, Pennywise looked at you, eyes blazing. “Is that the only one you know?”  
You shook your head. “I know lots. And most have the same sort of feeling, too.”  
“Another. Play another.”  
You began playing a cover of Eyes on Fire by Blue foundation, and the clown returned to his trance. You realized he actually liked your playing. This was the first step you needed to know the creature, and it was a large step indeed. As you played on, the spectacle continued. You imagined it must look odd, to say the least, from afar. A girl in a button up shirt with no pants on, playing a dark tune for a horrific monster, winding about the sewer as if he were in a grand ballroom with his lady love.  
For the rest of that day, the whole town of Derry was saturated with the sound of haunting piano that sounded like it came from the sewers, but surely, it could not be so.


	4. Reluctant Admissions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera sees the horrific side of Pennywise - in more ways than one.
> 
> *WARNING* NON CONSENSUAL SEXUAL ACTIVITY AND REFERENCES TO RAPE.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember, Vera is now 1st person.
> 
> Here is the link to the song she plays in this chapter.  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQk3w3exNgk

~Pennywise~

I enjoyed watching the small woman struggle with the instrument four times her size. I could’ve helped her, but I was much happier sitting on the rocking chair, toying with her box full of addictions. I could feel her growing irate at me, but I didn’t care.  
Eventually she managed to pull it free, using old crates as a makeshift stool. I frowned to myself. I would have to get a proper stool. I couldn’t have some terrible excuse for a chair ruining her back; it was mine to mutilate. Surely I didn’t care otherwise.  
Surely I didn’t.  
She sat her willowy frame down and played some arbitrary nonsense, presumably to warm her joints. I felt calm oozing from her, familiarity soothing her. I didn’t like it. That was the opposite of what I wanted from her. I puffed on the cigarette, however, and let her continue. I wanted to see what she would do. She was at least a curiosity, at most… I wasn’t sure.  
She began playing something when she felt she was ready. It started out lower on the keys, dark and mysterious. As it progressed, the melody thickened, became more robust. As she played on, I felt something that I’d only felt in my first few feedings. Wonder.  
Silently, I rose and made my way over to her. I crouched by her feet, which were working methodically on the pedals beneath. I angled my body toward her, watching her face as she played. It bewildered me how simple sounds could elicit feelings of calm in her, yet the very same combinations were making me feel something similar. I looked at her hands. They were slight and unmarred, incredibly smooth and liquid. The flowed across the keys, like they had a mind of their own, and they already knew where they wanted to be. I closed my eyes momentarily, before they darted to her face and her hands again. Over and over, as if of their own accord, my eyes repeated this cycle.  
The song came to its soft close, and she looked down at me, perplexed. I grinned and began a slow, loud clap. “She performs again.” I rose quickly, grabbing her small wrist and twirling her under my arm before setting her back onto the seat that was her stage. “Again.”  
Even more puzzled than before, she gazed up at me, questions in her blue eyes. But she conceded, and began the melody again. I made my way to a space in the room and positioned my arms as if she were in them, then I began a simulated waltz. As she made the keys sing, I imagined doing dreadful, delightful things to her. I pictured breaking her thin film of a skin and watching her blood flow freely over my hands. I pictured my hands around her throat and tasting her fear as she realized her death was coming. I felt bones breaking under my hold, squirming beneath me as I forced my way into her – I hummed as I imagined these things, giggling softly to myself. She would be delicious.  
The song ended once more, and I fixed my eyes on her. “Is that the only one you know?” I didn’t bother trying to contain my excitement. The thoughts of ripping her apart were joyous and I intended to adore them.  
She shook her head. “I know lots. And most have the same sort of feeling, too.”  
“Another. Play another.” I licked my lips. She moved again; this time, the song had a higher counterpart, every bit as tantalous as the last piece. I began waltzing again, to visions of raping and maiming her perfect body.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Vera~

Though the bed looked older than my granddad, it was incredibly comfortable. Pennywise had brought me clean linen so I wasn’t sleeping in filth. It was an oddly touching gesture, but I was unsure where his thoughtfulness – if it could even be called that – was stemming from. Probably something disturbing.  
I sank into the soft, pillowy mass, more comfortable than I ever thought I could be in a crazed child-eaters home. The pillows didn’t smell like anything, but I was fine with that. I hardly wanted them to smell of mold and mildew. My mind wandering, I found myself wishing it smelled like… like cotton candy.  
I sat up, my back ramrod straight. What in the actual fuck. Yes, sure, I’d sought Pennywise out, but not to… not to have my damn pillows smell like his tactfully alluring, sweet, distinct scent. Though, if I buried my face enough, my shirt, which he had given to me among a mass of clean clothes, smelled faintly of the saccharine aroma. And I really, REALLY liked it.  
I found myself in want of a shower. I grabbed one of the water bottles I’d been given and splashed some into a bowl on my used dresser, and washed my face with it. The coolness didn’t propel me to want to sleep, but I wasn’t having much success in that endeavour anyway. I was grateful that the shirt I was wearing was several sizes too big. I donned my knee-length sweater and made my way outside, intending on another cigarette. I lit up, revelling in the instant calm that washed over me, and I found myself wondering if Pennywise could feel it. Probably. I hoped it pissed him off.  
As I exhaled, I fanned the smoke from my face. How odd that I felt so at home in such an odd place, so singular in its atmosphere. I’d always been an oddity. When I was very young, I favoured black clothing where the other girls liked pink and purple. My paintings were always brown and black. Small warning signs my parents had seen, and sent me off to live at boarding school. They didn’t want to deal with my dark nature.  
That’s what had led me here. After I’d been raped by some men in a dark alley, I’d learned it was not people to fear, but their desires. Hence why I was such an oddity to the clown I had to presume was sleeping inside. If he even slept. I mean, he slumbered for, what was it? 27 years at a time? On second thought, maybe he wasn’t asleep. But he was certainly absent.  
A movement in my periphery caught my attention. Was that… was that Pennywise? I got up slowly, trying not to make any noise. I moved closer, but he didn’t notice. He was hunched over something, his head moving rapidly, almost like it was twitching. My stomach filled with dread as I heard grunts and wet sounds coming from his direction.  
Unable to stop myself, I paced around him till I was facing his front. There, on the ground before him, was a child. A very, very dead child. So dead, I couldn’t even tell if it was a boy or a girl. The head was detached, as was the arm Pennywise was chewing on. There were claw marks on the belly, between which entrails poked out. There were bruises and cuts all over the tiny body. In horror, I tore my gaze away and locked onto Pennywise, who grinned while he continued his meal. I was beyond disturbed, beyond terrified – I couldn’t scream even if I wanted to. I turned away and violently threw up, glad I’d managed to not further defile the poor child’s body with my sick.  
I bolted back to the house, nearly falling more than once. I heard pennywise snarl, then a dull thud as he threw what remained of the arm onto the ground. He stormed after me, his steps much bigger than mine. He caught up with me in seconds.  
I almost got inside. His massive hand held the door shut. I turned to look at him, and he slammed his body against mine.  
“Do you still feel pity, Vera?” he thundered. “Look at me! This is what I do, and I LOVE it.” Blood was flying from his mouth onto me, yet all I could smell was that sweet, defying cotton candy. No words came to me. Pennywise roared again, backhanding me so hard I was surprised my head didn’t fall off my shoulders. Reeling, I pushed against him, but he was too strong. Too big. I didn’t stand a chance. He grabbed a fistful of my hair from the top of my head and forced me to look at him. Tears were flowing freely down my cheeks. Was he going to kill me?  
Frantically, I unpinned a hand from behind me and struck his face. My nails broke the skin, but his blood didn’t fall. It floated. He didn’t move an inch, but his glowing eyes grew brighter. Horrified, I realised my pitiful attempt at fighting back had aroused him. I could feel his hardness against my stomach.  
He leaned in, so close I felt his lashes on my forehead. “If you want to live past today,” he growled, and in that moment, I was so scared I thought I’d pass out. “If you want to live past today, go inside. Don’t EVER do that again.” He turned the doorknob behind me and I fell onto my ass, staring up at him in horror, still crying. He turned away and went back to his unfinished meal.  
I couldn’t just go inside. I found my still lit, unfinished cigarette and finished it in one wobbly drag. Then, gathering my courage, I went to the piano. It was not facing where he was eating, but it wasn’t entirely facing away, either. My hands still shaking almost uncontrollably, I began to play The End of Everything by Trivium. I did this because, while I was horrified, he had to eat. And even though he probably didn’t care, I didn’t want him to think I condemned him for it.  
The song was less than a minute and a half, and I was unsure if he’d finish by then, so I played on a loop. I just kept playing, losing count of how many times I started over. Again and again, I played the song, getting myself perhaps not into a sense of calm, but out of my sense of terror. Behind me, Pennywise finished his meal, and I stopped to watch him. He looked at me, and went inside. I stood up, and stared at the door. I wasn’t ready to move.  
Pennywise emerged again, his face and costume somehow clean. I looked over, but the mess than had been the child was gone. Had he eaten all of the body? I looked back at Pennywise, who was now, once again, uncomfortably close. Wordlessly, he picked me up and set me on my makeshift stool so I was somewhat closer to his height. He looked at my face, searching for something. I couldn’t tell you what.  
In a heartbeat, his mouth was on mine. His lips forced mine open, and his tongue swirled around mine. He didn’t taste of blood or flesh. Still cotton candy. I wanted to kick myself when I kissed back. My hands went to the ruffles around his neck, trying to pull him closer somehow. His hands were all over me, and the accompanying terror that took me was exquisite. I didn’t want it to stop, but it had to. I wasn’t going to make out with him after he’s eaten a kid then almost given me a concussion. Even though I technically already had.  
Gasping, I yanked my head away from his. Forgetting his warning before, I open-handedly smacked his across his face. His head snapped to the side, then immediately back to look at me. His eyes were once again ablaze.  
“Silly Vera. Didn’t I tell you not to do that?” He giggled.  
He moved to a blur. Suddenly I had a pain in my head so strong I would’ve crumpled had he not had his arms around me, a leftover blessing from his assault on my mouth. My head rolled freely as he carried me to my room. I couldn’t speak. It was like I’d been knocked out, but I was actually awake. The smell of fairy floss washed about me, and, ridiculously, I was comforted. Though I had struck him with all my might, he set me gently on the floor by the bed, and suddenly, the pain was gone. I was still out of it, though.  
His large, gloved hands caressed my thighs. “Here I was thinking we were going to have a little fun. You can’t imagine the feeling of feeding to something like that music in the background.” His hands moved up a little. He pressed a kiss so gently upon my lips it was almost sweet. “Of course, I could always just take what I want anyway.”  
He sat on the bed with his legs open, and moved me so I sat in between them, my back against his chest. I couldn’t fight. I knew what was coming but I was powerless. He buried his nose in my neck, an apparently favoured place to breathe my fear in. Then his hand began massaging my thighs. His hands moved further up with each stroke, till they finally came to rest between my legs. I was in a state of terror, but I was aroused as well. It was so confusing to my senses, I would’ve been helpless even if not afflicted with the convenient haze that was clouding my world.  
Gently, he began to rub his hand against me. Immediately, of course, heat started to build between my thighs. My body quivered, and I felt his teeth scrape along my neck and shoulder. Goosebumps shot down my spine, betraying my mind as my body sang to his touch.  
His other hand found his way to my breast. “Isn’t that how you like it? That’s how you did it yesterday.” His voice was a growl in my ear, and a small whimper escaped my lips. In response, his had move faster, applying more pressure. I could feel his hardness, uncomfortably stiff against my back, and I wondered if he was going to rape me. If it would even BE rape. I was too muddled.  
My body began to tremble. His hand moved from my breast to my throat, tipping my head back so he could run his tongue along my neck. His teeth found my ear, and my body shook even more. I was always a quick study. It never took me long to get off.  
As the feeling built, his hand tightened, enough that I struggled to breathe. Then it moved to my hair and yanked hard enough to tear some out. My breath was hitched, small moans escaping my mouth. I couldn’t stop it, I was about to –  
I began crying. The unwanted orgasm washed through me, more powerful than any I’d ever had, and I was unsure if I were crying because it was done against my will (?) or because it was so intense, I couldn’t cope. All I knew was that once the tears started, they didn’t stop. Pennywise didn’t leave; in a strangely touching gesture, he shifted, and turned me onto my side, so we were in some sort of semblance of an embrace. The hazy state lifted off me, but I didn’t want to move. Even if it was the murderous dancing clown who’d just assaulted me, I wanted to be held. Tiny aftershocks rippled through me, and, wrapped in the arms of Pennywise the Dancing Clown, I drifted into a restless sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Pennywise~  
She was warm against me. Warm and ripe, and fearful. As the orgasm washed over her, she began to cry, and I enjoyed it. I felt her ecstasy in my unique second-hand fashion, and I shifted her to rest on my side. She sniffled, but didn’t protest. Oh yes, I enjoyed the tears. But I was also troubled by them. It was one thing to enjoy hitting her across the face outside when she’d seen me feasting, but to make her cry with such defeat? No, I couldn’t have her defeated. Her courage made the game more fun. And, perhaps… perhaps I cared for her just a microscopic amount. For the first time in my long life, I felt remorse.  
She slept, and I stayed there. I stayed there the whole night, feeling her twitch and moan and shift. When she woke the next day, she looked me in the eye. I could feel her surprise at me remaining there, but she didn’t speak. Turning away from me, she pulled the ridiculously large shirt off, and changed into a dress I’d brought for her. She then used water in a small bowl on her dresser to wash her face. She came back to the bed. Wordlessly, she crawled under the covers again, and into my arms. Her fingers played with the ruffles on my costume. Yes, for the first time in my long life, I felt remorse. But more importantly, I felt hope.


	5. Date Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, it's not gonna go smoothly.

~Vera~

It was quiet. I was in my little room, gazing out the small window to the sewer beyond that was now my home. Pennywise had left after a while, sliding out from under me. Neither of us spoke about what happened the night before. I assumed it was some sort of perverse punishment for defying his orders. Strangely, I didn’t feel violated. I wasn’t sure if I liked what he had done to me, by I certainly hadn’t hated it.  
A movement caught my attention. Pennywise was seated at the piano I’d frequented for the past 2 days, testing the keys out. The ones he was hitting were dissonant and wrong on every scale you could imagine, but the act was making me feel warm. Did he really like my playing that much?  
I moved closer to the window, and watched him grunt in frustration. The sounds seemed familiar, just off. Concentrating harder, my chest bubbled with pride and fondness as I realised he was trying to remember the first song I’d ever played in front of him.  
I was so confused. I had come here seeking fear. I’d gotten that. That had very shortly developed into a desire to understand him. I’d seen him in his most animalistic state; I’d seen his anger, his torment, his joy, his wonder, his shock, his arousal, all in 2 days. I’d been physically harmed, sexually assaulted, I’d had my boundaries erased like chalk on a teaching board, and while I could reconstruct them, they’d never been the same. He had been nothing but unkind, nasty, and murderous, yet despite his monstrous nature… Did I really care for him? Already? Even knowing what I knew? I turned away from the window and banged my head on the wall. I needed to pop a fucking Xanax. Too many feeling were running wild inside me.  
The piano music faded, but faintly, I could hear… carnival music? Holy shit, was it already time for the yearly Halloween street festival? I’d come here purposefully during October, so I could experience it. I was fairly certain it was evening; it was hard to keep track when it was always dark down here. I was hit with sudden inspiration. Grabbing my cigarettes, I bounded outside, feeling playful. As I opened the door, Pennywise was still seated at the piano. Skipping down the stairs, I grinned mischievously at him.  
He cocked an eyebrow and leered back. “What’s got you in such a good mood, puppet?”  
I lit my cigarette and moved closer to him, blowing the smoke around his head. It clouded around him, but he didn’t seem to mind. Sitting at the seat, he was actually the same height as me standing. “Well, you’ve got this wonderful costume. Why let it go to waste?” He didn’t catch on. “I wanna go to the festival.”  
He rose, looking down at me from his lofty height. “I’m certainly dressed the part. But you? You look dreadful.” He frowned momentarily, a small pout shaping his mouth. Then he raised his finger, as if a light bulb had gone off in his mind. It seemed playful Pennywise was here today. “Oh! I know.” With a jingle, he popped out of existence. Just like that. Poof.  
I stood there, a little shocked, but not entirely surprised. I waited around for about ten minutes, finishing my cigarette. Soon, Pennywise (I think?) popped back in front of me, but he looked like a human. Dark hair, blue eyes, very plain looking. Easy to forget. When he spoke, however, his familiar, jolly voice rang out.  
“Here, I think this is fitting.” He giggled and handed me a plastic bag filled with stuff. I went to dig through. “Uh, uh.” He waggled his finger at me. “Inside. I want it to be a surprise!”  
Puzzled, I looked at him. He made a shooing gesture. Apparently, his mood was light, so, unwilling to ruin it, I did as I was told. In my room, I emptied the bag. Inside was a costume, and makeup to paint my face to match. When I saw what it was, I snorted. How very appropriate. I slipped into the costume. Vertically striped leggings, a fluffy mini-tutu, and a mock corset, all patterned in red and white. Wrist and neck wraps were nice little adornments to compliment the whole spectacle. He’d bought me a clown outfit to complement his own, albeit a sexy, adult one instead of a terrifying, tattered mess.  
I quickly painted my lips red, winged my eyes and applied mascara, and painted a small black diamond on my cheekbone. Twirling in front of the old, full-length mirror I’d been given, I decided one last touch was needed. Separating the top half of my long, red-brown locks, I tied them in half again at each side of my head. I found myself hoping Pennywise would like it.  
When I stepped out of the house, Pennywise was back to the awful clown I’d grown so fond of. He didn’t speak. He didn’t need to. His eyes spoke volumes. Languidly, they travelled from my toes to my head, taking in every angle and curve I had to offer. I did a spin for him.  
“I think you chose well, Mr Pennywise. How do I look?”  
Drool leaked in and endless stream to the already damp ground. He had a primal look in his eyes that dug a pit into my stomach and made my head spin. Prey. He was looking at me like a predator who had trapped his prey and was about to have a tremendously satisfying meal. “I think you know how you look, puppet.” He waggled his fingers at me in a mock attempt at jazz hands. He walked over and offered me his arm, and, in a rush of air, we were in the back corners of the tents and stalls at the festival. I couldn’t help but feel a rush. I didn’t think I was a sociopath, but the thought of terrorising the town at his side made me giddy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Pennywise~

I knew I’d picked the right costume. She thought it was me trying to be funny, when, in reality, I just wanted to see if she suited the gimmick she’d become so partial to. It had only been 2 days and yet, I could sense her feelings toward me becoming more and more affectionate. It bewildered me. I wasn’t sure how she could look past my ludicrously chilling appearance, and the fact that I took joy in murdering small humans, nor could I fathom what it was she saw there worth caring for.  
She stepped out of the house not too long after skipping up the steps, her good mood infusing the air around her. She looked every bit as magnificent as I’d pictured. The tights and corset hugged her slim frame. The cuffs and choker – both laced with ruffles, not quite as big as mine – added a playful note to the whole affair that represented her personality perfectly. And with my special intuition, no one could understand her personality like I could.  
She looked positively delicious. I didn’t hide it either. Slowly, I ran my eyes up the length of her legs, the small dip of her waist, the larger swell of her breasts, and finally, to the ridiculously cute style she’d put her hair into. The pigtails made perfect handlebars for me to fuck her from behind.  
She twirled and looked at me, clearly pleased with herself. “I think you chose well, Mr Pennywise. How do I look?”  
Again, saliva was oozing uncontrollably from my mouth. She was taunting me. I’d make her regret it. She was in denial if she thought she could get away with provoking me in that innocent way while dressed like that. “I think you know how you look, puppet.” I shook my hands at her in a clowny fashion. Then I approached her and offered my arm. She slipped her fragile extremity through mine, and in seconds, we were in the back corners of the festival, which was in full action. It was the one time of year I could come out and be inconspicuous. People were in full costume, laughing, drunk, filled with food, the usual maladaptive distractions they used to side-track themselves from their boring, repetitive lives.  
Beside me, Vera’s disposition was singing. The festival made her feel alive. As we walked through the crowd, I felt smug when children and adults pointed at me in horror and awe, but I felt more satisfied still when I saw the males eyeing Vera and wondering why in the world she was on the arm of someone as ugly as me. In a contradictory fashion, it also angered me. She was not theirs to lust over. She was mine. Only mine.  
The music was deafening. As opposed to the giant speakers by the stage on the other side of the festival, someone was playing a “spooky” tune on the organ not too far from where we stood. I led Vera over to a somewhat empty space, waving mischievously at the children we passed. I offered my hand, and, realizing what I was proposing, her face lit up in a giant smile that could quite literally ignite the dark in my sewer. I spun her around expertly, musing about how the pianist had very little skill compared to the fragile creature that was strangely trusting me. Usually, human instinct screamed at them to get as far away from me as possible, yet here she was, giddy, like I was sharing a first date with her fresh out of high school.  
By now, we had attracted a crowd. Cameras were flashing, but I wasn’t worried. I never showed up on human devices unless I willed it, and neither would Vera. As much as I wanted to pretend that this display was me just salting the meat, flavouring it before I feasted on it, I was enjoying myself. What wasn’t to enjoy, after all? Free reign for one night, all the children conveniently grouped into one small part of the town, and a woman in my arms who was pleasing to the eye. One I had initially planned to eat but now… Now I had other plans.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My surroundings were a rush as Pennywise lead me across his makeshift dancefloor. The thick smell of liquor, freshly cooked corn, fast food swirled around me, all laced with the intoxicating scent of cotton candy. I noticed people taking pictures of us, but I assumed Pennywise would have some solution. In an age ruled by technology, if he didn’t, he’d have been thwarted long ago. Well, by someone other than the Loser’s Club, I supposed.  
As the song ended, I realised people were applauding. Pennywise bowed low, grinning eerily. I gave as best a curtsy as I could; I was never really good at the lady-like things. He then offered his arm, and we made our way to one of the food stalls. I was craving Coke. Neither myself nor Pennywise had money, but, with a single flash of the clown’s luminescent eyes, the stall worker had hurled the bottle at me and fled into the back. I burst out laughing; I mean sure, I knew how it felt to be scared by the man-demon beside me, but hell if it wasn’t funny to watch people nearly piss their pants from nothing more than a shady look. I wondered how it felt to have that kind of influence over people. Thinking about it that way, I could kind of see why Pennywise enjoyed it. It was certainly empowering, and who didn’t want to be powerful?  
Pennywise watched me, a ferocious curiosity blazing in his glistening eyes. Was it really so odd to him that I’d find that amusing? I wondered as I took a long, refreshing drink from the stolen bottle. It had only been 2 days, but damn was it good to have the sickly-sweet drink on my tastebuds once more. The aftertaste was sugary and thick, and reminded me of how Pennywise tasted when he swirled his tongue into my mouth. Heat flooded my face, painting my cheeks red. He reached down to pinch one.  
“Perfect,” he said approvingly. “A little colour makes you all the more alluring. Why didn’t I think of that?” He frowned, and I realized when he did, the pout that accompanied it was unintentional.  
I reached up and played with his jutting lower lip. “There are other ways to put colour in my cheeks, Pen.” I winked.  
He caught my finger in his teeth, biting hard enough to cause me the slightest amount of pain. I felt a growl vibrate his cavernous mouth, and my stomach dropped out again. I had no idea what had gotten into me. Flirting with a damn demon. I pulled my hand away, promptly embarrassed because I’d enjoyed it.  
Looking down the food street, I saw the next on over had – of all things – a clown making balloon toys for children. Unthinkingly, I pulled Pennywise along with me to watch. The man’s costume was cute, much more child-friendly. The children recoiled when they saw Pennywise, obviously frightened by his disturbing image. He waved, jiggling his fingers rather than moving his entire hand.  
“No need to be scared, kids!” His voice was falsely cheery, and even the balloon-maker sensed something off. He frowned at Pennywise, then looked at me, brows raised questioningly. I smiled sweetly, offering him no information. Pennywise was studying a particular kid especially hard. She was older than the others, maybe 16 or 17. She had cropped black hair and was dressed in gothic clothes. It struck me that she wasn’t in costume. She was a modern-day goth. She fit right in.  
He then turned his attention to the others. “Look, I can do balloon tricks too!” he pointed behind them, past me and we all turned. A mass of the familiar red balloons drifted in a pack towards the little gathering. The children were increasingly fearful, and I looked back at Pennywise. His nostrils were flaring. He’d chosen a child. I was careful not to look at any of their faces. I didn’t want to know.  
The lights illuminating the balloon stand blew out, as did the others within a 10-foot radius. Seconds later, they were back on, but Pennywise had vanished, along with the balloons, and another, bite-sized victim. The goth girl was gazing at me, her eyes hard like stone. Somehow, I felt like she was… different. Like me. Unafraid. I bared my teeth at her. I wasn’t about to have a rival competing with me for my counterpart’s affections. I may not be a child-eating demon, but I was certainly far from having a stellar code of morals. I’d knock the bitch out.  
I wandered through the festival, knowing eventually Pennywise would find me again. I was in no rush; the atmosphere had my spirits high, and I was happy to hang around. As I meandered aimlessly, a hand grabbed my arm. I looked down at it. Pale, with short, black nails. For fuck’s sake.  
“What do YOU want?” I snarled at the goth girl.  
She didn’t flinch. “Who’s that guy you were with? Amazing costume. Looks like it’s real.” Her words were hard and clipped. It suddenly struck me that she knew what he was. The urban legend of him was well known, after all.  
I narrowed my eyes at the little twat. “Oh, you mean Pen? I can introduce you if you want.” I offered her a saccharine smile.  
She didn’t play along. “So you don’t know where he is. What’s he doing?”  
I shrugged nonchalantly. I really didn’t like this girl. “Oh, you know. About. Doing his thing. You know, the thing he does best.” I wiggled my brows and her and snapped my teeth.  
She scowled and stepped toward me, so close I could feel her breath on my mouth. “What are you, his play thing? He’ll tire of you quickly. And even if he doesn’t, you must be one fucked-up fruit from the apple tree to be around him so willingly.”  
I ran my tongue lightly along her lower lip. “Come with us and find out just how fucked up I am.”  
She released my arm and spat on the ground, disgusted. She stormed off into the masses, and in seconds, she was gone. I knew this would come back and bite either myself or Pennywise – or both of us – in the ass.  
My mood only slightly dampened, I turned to find something to entertain me – and walked smack into the broad chest that belonged to Pennywise. I stepped back and looked up at him, but he was looking in the direction that the girl had disappeared.  
“I don’t like her.” The words were childish and naïve, but his tone was hushed and angry.  
“Neither do I. Conceited little bitch.”  
Pennywise giggled his oddly high-pitched laugh and glanced down at me. “You handled her well. Inviting her to come with us. But I wonder,” he mused, his gaze darkening. “Just how fucked up are you?”  
I rolled my eyes. I’d had enough. I beckoned him to follow me; it was pitch black and I wanted to explore the forest. Nothing would happen to me with him around. Well, at least not by anyone else. We left the outskirts of the festival, and ventured into the thick woods beyond. I was feeling free and alive, forgetting about the girl who thought she was some sort of little hero. My mood was high and I was not about to let that go to waste.  
A small clearing appeared before us, and I realised we were right by the big storm pipe that lead into the twisting maze of sewers that lead to my new home. I wasn’t quite ready to go back yet. I was feeling frivolous.  
“Pennywiiiiiise,” I sang, and he turned to me with slight confusion. “I want cotton candy.”  
He growled at me. “You just brought me all the way here to say you want cotton candy? Humans are so fickle. Don’t you think with that tiny head of yours?”  
I sauntered over to him, hoping he would catch onto what I was implying. He did not. “That’s not what I meant,” I purred. I’d had some alcohol while he was off eating, and it was finally working its dark magic. He turned to me, his face almost invisible in the dark save for his radiant eyes. I walked my fingers up his chest and around his neck, but I couldn’t reach his face. Too tall.  
“You know what tastes like cotton candy?” I asked sweetly. I fiddled with the ruffled around his neck, pulling him down to me. Seconds later, that sweet taste filled my mouth. His hands bunched up around the stupid tutu I was wearing, and with a rumble, he tore the thing completely off me and threw it into the river. He walked me over to a tree, then propped me up against it, my legs around his waist, so he didn’t have to bend so far to meet my face with his.  
He tipped my head back and bit into my shoulder, hard. I cried out as I felt the skin break, but he didn’t move. He latched onto my shoulder, tasting my flesh and blood, and though I was horrified, I was beyond aroused. His tongue moved up along my neck, wrapping around my ear, grinding his body against mine. He was rubbing against me exactly as I needed, and small sighs of breath were stolen from me as desire rolled through me.  
His hand moved to my neck, and clamped around it, locking me to the tree, his mouth going back to my shoulder. He began sucking on the small wounds he’d created there, and it was painful. I yelped, but he just sucked harder. Tears were forming in my eyes and I pried his head away from me, and drove my mouth onto his. I needed to take his attention elsewhere.  
His hands gripped my hips, digging into pressure points, sending jolts of pain and pleasure through my entire body. He pulled his mouth from mine and cursed, before stopping everything entirely. Both of our chests were heaving, and I wondered what on earth could be wrong. His eyes travelled to my wounded shoulder again and his nostrils flared. He was drooling profusely.  
Snarling, he dropped me and stormed away from me.  
“Oh, come ON,” I wailed. “You can’t DO that!” He was in the entrance to the sewer, but he paused and glanced at me over his shoulder. When he spoke, I felt shivers down my spine.  
“If I don’t get away from you,” he sang forlornly, shaking his head slightly, “I am going to eat you.”


	6. 180

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who knew Vera had a dark side?

~Vera~ 

When we’d finally made it back to the heart of the sewer complex, I was exhausted. Immediately I flopped onto my bed, ready to pass out. I was vaguely annoyed that Pennywise had insisted on walking rather than just poofing us here, but if it’s what kept me alive, I could hardly complain.  
The next morning I felt rested, and I had wanderlust. I wanted to venture out again, but I only wanted to do so if Pennywise would accompany me. I enjoyed his warped personality. He may not be the nicest dude on the planet, but the way he’d swing me around last night was a touching enough gesture that I was fully-fledged, quite possible, maybe, but not really, head over heels for the big oaf.  
I trekked outside and into the big space we took residence in. Pennywise was rifling through his mountain of plunders, and I wondered briefly if he ever reminisced about his favourite victims. He placed something in among the mass. Upon closer inspection, I saw it was a glow-stick bracelet.  
“Is that from last night?” I queried. He looked over at me, tossing something in my direction. I caught it, oddly touched when I noticed it was a pack of cigarettes, the same brand I’d brought down here. I was grateful; my packet was dwindling down to almost nothing.   
“The child liked glowing things. He was fun to play with. Couldn’t look away from my eyes.” A malevolent smile drifted over his mouth.  
I sucked on a juice box, one of the treats in the little haul he’d brought down for me the day I’d arrived. “Do you always take something of theirs?”  
He met my eyes, that dark grin still on his features. “Why, yes. I’ve had so many, I need something to remember them by. Every experience is scrumptious, and I would hate to forget any single one.” His gaze drifted to my healing shoulder. “Some, I don’t need help remembering.”  
I swallowed thickly, and he approached me, stroking my face possessively. “Do you even know how delicious you smell? I couldn’t stop myself from tasting you last night. And when I did, I wanted to rip you apart, into small pieces I could savor for days to come.” He said the words sadly, shaking his head as his hand trailed down past my neck, coming to rest where my wounds were.   
“Now, I’m not going to argue with you walking away, because I’m, you know, here and alive,” I rambled. “But, why didn’t you? I don’t understand why you’d stop. Isn’t that what you do? Eat people?”  
He did respond for a minute. I could almost hear the gears turning in his head as he formulated his answer.  
“Who else would play for me in this little sliver of hell I have down here?” he gestured nonchalantly at the piano. “Besides,” he said softly, “I’ll have you when the time is right. No need to rush.”  
I frowned. The words sounded… empty. Did he really plan to eat me, after all? I had noticed, last night, he had almost always had a hand on me, and rather than restrictive, it felt… possessive. I’d gotten a few looks from some men, and yeah, dressed the way I was, it was to be expected. But Pennywise had shot each and every one of them a threatening look, and they’d backed off. I wondered if, somewhere in that black, black heart of his, if he’d begun to care for me at all.  
I opened my mouth, but I soon forgot what I was about to say. Pennywise had gone deathly still, a faint shimmer in the air around him. Puzzled, I tilted my head at him, but he held a finger to his lips. He nodded towards the giant open grate that we’d come through last night to get back. So help me, the little goth bitch was standing there. She was looking at me, and suddenly, I realised she couldn’t see Pennywise. That must be what the rippling air was about.  
I sighed. I didn’t know what he had planned, but for now, it looked like I was going to have to deal with her.  
“Lovely day for it, isn’t it? Nothing like a stroll in the sewers to get your spirits lifted.” I opened my new pack and lit a cigarette.  
She scowled at me. “Where is he?”  
I feigned confusion. “Who? It’s just me down in this wonderful abode.” I gestured about me grandly, and Pennywise snickered under his breath. Briefly, I realized my behaviour could be viewed as toying with someone. In fact, it was strikingly similar to the way Pennywise behaved. Falsely charismatic. “How did you even find this place?”  
She threw my tutu from last night into the room as she stepped inside. Damn. Sometime during our brief but wild kissing, Pennywise had thrown it into the river. He really needed to stop overlooking the small things. “Oh, he’s not here. So that fucking mountain of children’s toys is yours?”  
I raised my hands in front of me in surrender. “You got me. I’m the one who’s been killing the children this time around. My family is a tree of serial child killers and we just can’t stop.” I pointed at the house behind me. “We have lived in this house for generations, but I’m the last one left. Usually we stick to the small ones, but seeing as you’ve come here so willingly…” I thought back and wondered if this was similar to how Pennywise felt when I came looking for him. Two in one week. Quite the attraction. “I’m happy to make an exception.” I ambled towards her.  
Confusion was dancing in her eyes, and I began laughing, my breath erratic. She’d almost bought the bullshit I’d spewed off the top of my head. I went back to the chair on the porch. “Alright,” I wheezed, gesturing in Pennywise’s direction. “I’m done. Do your thing.”  
With a faint jingle, Pennywise had popped into the girl’s vision. Her eyes hardened, and he waved at her, bunching his shoulders up like a child shyly greeting an aunt for the first time. “Hiya, Miranda,” he said cheerily. “You’re my second visitor this week! Although, you’re not as nice as Vera here, nor nearly as pretty. What brings you into my den?”  
His words were jolly but the way he moved was liquid grace, all sinister and stalker-like. He truly did look like a predator. It was incredibly breathtaking, to finally see him in his element, prowling about his little haven that the girl had so foolishly come into. How odd it must have looked when I did the same thing 3 days before, I mused. I didn’t think he was going to be as forgiving with her as he had been with me. I smirked to myself. Damn right.  
He approached her with a comically jovial skip when she didn’t respond. To my utter shock, she pulled out a big, sharp pipe. Pennywise paused his advance.  
“I’m not afraid of you,” she challenged. “I’ll kill you.”  
Pennywise launched at her, but she leapt out of the way. He turned to her, and breathed in for longer than I thought possible. Her words must have been true, because he snarled in frustration before diving for her again. He smacked her across the head and even managed to get his teeth into her leg before she booted him in the face with all her might. Making a noise between a whimper and a snarl, Pennywise retreated. It was evident his power was great, but it stemmed from one thing, and she was not offering it. I watched, horrified as she swung the pipe and it literally caved his head in. He was facing me, and her back was exposed. He looked at me, then at her, but he was weak. His skin was flaking, like cracks in old cement, and, with shock, I realised she COULD kill him.   
I was furious. How dare she. How dare this little fucking mutt come down here and threaten the rickety peace I’d found. How dare she come down here and think she could hurt my clown. I was blinded by rage. Unthinkingly, I got up and charged at her, thankful I had not changed out of my costume from the night before. It was exceptionally easy to move in.  
I tackled her, and we both collided into the ground. We fought for dominance, but she gained the upper hand. She straddled my waist and made as if she was going to hit me with the pipe. I caught her hand mid swing, raised my head, and headbutted her at full force. Her nose cracked and she yelped, forgetting about me. Her hand flew to her now broken nose, and I used this to roll her onto the ground beneath me. I clamped both of my hands around her throat, taking huge satisfaction in watching her turn blue.  
“Nice try, bitch,” I spat at her. Her eyes were forming blood vessels, and her had found its way to my wounded shoulder, and she dug her nails in, attempting to distract me. It worked. For a moment.  
I screamed and released her neck, and she gasped, choking on the air as it flooded her lungs. I growled, completely sent over the edge. I made a fist and drove it into her cheek. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head momentarily, and I struck her again. This time, she was out cold.  
I didn’t stop. Again and again, I pummelled her face with my now sticky, bloodied fist, awash with ecstasy, watching her die underneath me. Blood was all over me, and I relished the warm feeling. Again, I struck her face, and I didn’t stop until it was nothing more than a mass of pulp and flesh. I looked over at Pennywise, who was watching me like he’d finally found god.  
I walked over to him, still furious. “They won’t touch you,” I snapped, straddling his waist, wrapping my arms around his neck. “None of them will lay a fucking finger on you.” I vowed it both to him and myself as I stroked the cracked skin that was beginning to mend itself. I crushed his mouth under mine, forgetting about the girl, forgetting about how I was covered in her blood. I revelled in his sweet taste and the fact he was still alive. In a rush of air, we were on my bed. His hands made their way to my hair and yanked my head back, and I cursed to myself silently. If anything got in the way of me fucking him this time, heads were going to roll.


	7. Blood and Sex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The moment you have all been waiting for! Enjoy the senseless smut!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO SORRY FOR LATE UPDATE. I got drunk with my mum and it's currently 2 am (I'm in Australia). Brief hiatus is up!
> 
> THERE IS BLOOD. But yall wanna fuck the clown too so i doubt yall care.

Chapter 7

~Vera~

He continued to surprise me. I’d gone out to the stream running at the mouth of the exit pipe to catch some fresh air. As much as I liked the sewer, the air was stagnant and thick. The way the air moved when I was actually in the real world was unable to be replicated in the chill that was now my home. I dipped my bare feet in the cool stream, longing for a shower. I’d whined at Pennywise about it this morning enough that he’d grown tired of my antics and lobbed an entire tricycle at my head. Thankfully, I’d had the presence of mind to duck out of the way.  
“Really?” I’d asked incredulously as the toy broke on impact with the cold floor. “Was that necessary?”  
“Is your incessant whinging necessary, Vera? You’re the most annoying person on the planet,” he’d snapped back. Stung, I’d made my way out here, to the cool autumn air. I lay down on the riverbank. I couldn’t imagine what had him in such an awful mood, especially after last night. I would’ve thought after a performance like that, he’d be tired and languid, and maybe hungry. I thought back, touching my shoulder and its new teeth marks, and my cheeks darkened. Maybe not hungry.  
I closed my eyes for a minute or an hour. I wasn’t sure which. When I opened them again, I yelped. Pennywise was looming over me, and drool almost hit me in the face. I sat up, immediately on the defensive.  
“What do you want?” I asked sullenly. I was still hurt over what he’d said earlier.  
He looked at me, expressionless. He didn’t open his mouth, just offered his arm. I sighed. I didn’t want to admit I needed his help, but I really didn’t want to walk back through the sewer. I took his arm and in seconds, we were back in the hub of the pipes. He walked inside, pausing once in the doorway to look at me. He jerked his head toward the house, inviting me to follow. I was still shitty at him for speaking to me the way he had so I flipped him off.  
He turned to face me, deadpan. “If you want to keep those pretty little fingers attached to your hand, you’ll come inside. I think you’ll like what you see.”  
The words were careless but I doubted the threat was genuine. Still, I followed him into the house, and in the second room, there was a steaming bath. It was hooked up to pipes that ran through the walls. I looked at the tub hungrily, then at Pennywise.  
“How’d you do that?”  
“This is a sewer, Vera,” he said patiently, albeit a tad exasperated. “Pipes everywhere.”  
I didn’t feel like learning the science behind it. “Why?” I asked. “You were fine enough this morning to yell at me for talking about it.” Hurt seeped into my tone. I knew I sounded petulant but I didn’t care.  
He stretched his long arms, brushing the ceiling. “Had to get you to shut up somehow.” He adjusted the ruffles around his neck. “Besides,” he admitted in an adorably uncertain tone, “you wanted it.” He turned and plonked onto a seat similar to the one on the porch. It seemed I was going to have a voyeur. I stared at him, watching his hulking frame fold into the chair. He was as sweet as he tasted, after all, however he tried to mask it.  
Wasting no more time, I stripped quickly and sank into the heavenly water. A sigh escaped my mouth as the water came to rest at my neck. This was… this was bliss. After 3 days with no shower, I couldn’t think if anything better. There was soap, a loofa, and even small bottles of shampoo and conditioner in a small bag hung on the side of the tub. Digging further in, I saw there was also a packet of razors. He was incredibly thoughtful when he wanted to be.  
I waved the bag of razors at him. “Don’t like your women hairy?” I taunted.  
He grinned. “I wouldn’t care. Although I like being able to see everything.” He ran his tongue along his teeth.  
I snorted and closed my eyes, sinking into the hot water. Moments later, I felt hands on my shoulders. Was… was Pennywise actually massaging me? I mean, I wasn’t going to argue because his fingers felt like heaven, but I was both surprised and amused. The clown continued to surprise me. I didn’t protest. His hand worked out small knots I didn’t know I had. Sighing, I dipped my head back further, momentarily opening my eyes to glance at him. He was looking down at me, mouth slightly open, eyes glazed. I smirked to myself and closed my eyes again, oddly content.  
He cleared his throat. I opened one eye, and to my surprise, he looked kind of… uncomfortable.  
“Look, I know I didn’t ask you to touch me, but you look like you’ve swallowed human food and want to throw up. You don’t have to do this.”  
He blinked, slowly. “That’s not…” He huffed childishly. I was becoming more accustomed to the juvenile mannerisms that cloaked his personality. They were oddly cute. “I’m… sorry.”  
I opened my other eye, a question for him in both. “For what?”  
He let go of my shoulders. I rolled over in the tub onto my stomach as he crouched to be eye level with me. “For throwing a tricycle at your head.” He paused. “And for calling you annoying. Hearing you moan about wanting a shower upset me because… I don’t want you to not have the things you want.” The last part came out in a rush and he was grudgingly looking at a spot above my head.  
I reached out and touched his face. “Well, you coulda just said that,” I said gently. “No need to throw a tricycle at me.”  
He chuckled a little. I had to admit, it was kind of funny. I reached out and pressed my lips on his, then tapped his nose with my finger. A small smile spread over his mouth.  
“Just, maybe don’t do it again.” I rolled back over and closed my eyes once more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Pennywise, the day before~

Not again.  
I couldn’t handle another kid who was untouchable. I’d never met her before, but I hated Miranda almost as much as I had hated Bill and his lackeys. If I made it out of this in one piece (unlikely, unless Vera was hiding a gun in that tight costume she still donned), I would skin her with my teeth, and make sure she was conscious the entire time.  
Miranda swung her pipe – where in the fuck had she hidden that when she walked in? – and it connected with my head. It didn’t really hurt, but I felt my head collapse in on itself. My vision blurred and I became dizzy. My skin began to crack, flaking and floating off into the air above me. I couldn’t really die, but I could be forced into my long slumber. There were few things that could awaken me from it ahead of time, and even fewer that could keep me awake for longer than my short year of terror.  
Resigned, I looked over to Vera, up at Miranda, then back to Vera. She was sitting in the chair that was her favourite haunt in this damp residence. I could feel fury hotter than the sun radiating off of her. She looked at me, then at Miranda, who was preparing her “killing” blow, and I felt a new fear from her I’d never felt from anyone. Fear for me.  
In a blur, she launched off the chair and charged Miranda. In seconds, they were rolling around, both fighting to gain the upper hand. Eventually, Miranda pinned Vera, and swung the pipe at her. As I saw it come closer to her, I felt some unnamed part of me begin to die. She would be killed with the same weapon that was to put me to sleep. How romantically tragic. I briefly wondered if her body would still be here when I awoke again. I wanted to stop Miranda, but I just – I couldn’t move.  
With coordination I’d never seen, Vera caught Miranda’s arm and slammed her brow into Miranda’s nose. Immediately, Miranda’s nose spurted out blood all over Vera’s outfit, but she didn’t miss a beat. Using this distraction, she vaulted at Miranda and she was soon the one on top. Her dainty hands clamped with strength I didn’t know she possessed around Miranda’s throat and in her livid haze, I felt joy singing to me from her. She was enjoying killing the girl.  
Miranda began to turn blue. “Nice try, bitch,” Vera spat at her. Frantically, Miranda’s eyes saw the wounds I’d left on Vera’s shoulder and she dug her fingers into it. Vera shrieked in pain, and at that moment, I decided I hated Miranda more than I could ever hate Bill.  
Instinctively, Vera drew her unwounded arm back into a fist, and drove it with as much strength as she could muster, into Miranda’s cheek. I felt both her and my own satisfaction as we heard the bone in her jaw crack. Incredibly, she was still conscious. Vera pulled her arm back and punched her again, and this time she blacked out. But Vera didn’t stop.  
Again and again, she pummelled Miranda’s face, each strike fuelled by more rage than the last. Her breathing was heavy, her eyes were hard, but aglow, and she was loving every second of it. For the first time since I met her, I was completely hypnotized. She was incredible, she was breathtaking, she was a goddess. I’d never wanted anything so badly in my life.  
Soon, Miranda was little more than a teenage girl’s body with flesh-coloured potato mash where the head should have been. Vera rose, not even sparing her remains a complimentary glance. She came right up to me and straddled my waist, her rage and exhilaration invigorating me.  
“They won’t touch you,” She snapped, and I believed her. “None of them will lay a fucking finger on you.” She caressed the dome in my head that had begun to stitch itself back together. She brought her lips to mine. With my newfound energy, I ported us to her bed, yanking her hair to expose her neck. I ran my teeth along it, small scratches bubbling blood into the air. I ran my tongue along it, revelling in how she tasted so much better than anyone I’d ever eaten. Last night, I couldn’t do this. I was so sure I wouldn’t be able to control myself, that I’d lose myself in the haze of her scent and her flavor and end up devouring her whole. After what I’d just witnessed, the protective vow she’d breathed onto me, after she’d killed for me, and the ecstasy I’d felt run through her as the life left Miranda – I knew I couldn’t kill this woman.  
But I could hurt her.  
I tore the corset from her small frame, her breasts as full and delicious as I remembered from the last time I’d seen them. I took one into my mouth, barely hearing her coo of approval. I was too taken with how thin and fragile the membrane holding them inside was. Carefully, I bit into them, and again, her taste erupted into my mouth. I growled as I savored her, rocking her hips on mine in an attempt to distract her from the pain. I wanted her to feel it, but I didn’t want her to tell me to stop. I wouldn’t.  
I pulled my mouth away, watching her blood trail over her breast and down her body. I looked up at her, my mouth and chin stained red. Her eyes were heavy with desire, and she slowly pressed a fingertip to the blood on my face. Locking onto my gaze, she raised her finger to her mouth and sucked the blood off. Again, I was enraptured. She was exotic, unique, and she was mine. She lowered her face to mine, and instead of kissing me, she ran her tongue flat along my mouth and chin, cleaning it of her own blood. A snarl erupted from me and I gently caught her tongue between my teeth. I didn’t want to mark her face. I forced my tongue into her mouth, and in one fluid motion, I flipped her onto the bed, on her back. In seconds her tights were gone and forgotten. I was done playing.  
I made my way up her leg, leaving small bite marks and smears of blood all over her and on the mattress beneath us. I was careful with her thighs; I didn’t want to graze an artery and have her bleed out. Finally I came to rest where I wanted to be, and, looking directly at her, I breathed in the heady scent that was so different from the one that the taste of her blood matched, delicious and hunger-inducing nonetheless. I pressed my tongue against the small nub at the top, and immediately I was met with sighs of approval, egging me on. I clamped my hands on each thigh, my nails digging in. Now she had matching claw marks to accompany the bites. As I mercilessly ran my tongue over her, her legs began to quiver. They clamped around my head tighter than I thought her capable of, but I didn’t stop. I didn’t stop until her breaths were almost inaudible. I didn’t want her to pass out. If she did, I was still fucking her, but I wanted her awake. I could save that for another time.  
In a flash, I had my own costume off. Still in the throes of her post-orgasm haze, she managed to smirk at me.  
“Huh, you look… normal. Somehow, I imagined something scary. Horns or something.”  
I raised a brow at her. I was covered in scars and my skin flaked all over. Sure, I had the outer anatomy of a regular human male, comfortably between lean and soft, but I was far from normal. I didn’t bother answering. She could ask me questions later. Right now, the only noises I wanted to hear coming out of her mouth was either my name or cries of pain or pleasure – or both.  
I took both of her wrists in my hand, soaking up how vulnerable she looked beneath me. Wasting no time, I shoved myself into her up to my hilt, growling as she tightened around me. I knew she’d been raped in the past but if I didn’t, I wouldn’t have thought she’d ever been had before. It didn’t matter. I was going to be the only one who ever had her again.  
I didn’t bother with easing her into it. After her entire fucking display of everything this morning, I was in no mood to play nice. I just wanted to fuck her. I began railing her at full force and speed, watching her face and her eyes squeezed shut and her mouth pursed in pain. Releasing her hands, I fixed my hand around her throat, delighting in the red shade her face took on. Panic danced in her eyes and I rutted harder into her, aware I was mercilessly striking her cervix, but I didn’t care. I loved every lick of pain that plagued her body. I released her neck and she began coughing. With every convulsion, she tightened around me, sweet and hot and inviting. I smacked her across the face, just hard enough to give her a spin.  
“None of that,” I rumbled at her. To my utter shock, she hit me back in the face. I slipped my hand under her back and fisted the other in her hair, lifting her off the bed and exposing her sweet, fragile neck once more. She made a noise between a whimper, a cough, and a sob, but then she spoke.  
“You can do better than that.”  
This little bitch was going to get her back broken. Snarling, I flipped her onto her stomach, fastening both of her hands behind her back with one of my own. The other forced her head into the mattress, a reminder that she was my property and I intended to use her. I started pounding her again, and when an orgasm washed through her, I didn’t stop. Vaguely I realised she couldn’t breathe, so I let her head go and whipped my palm across her bare ass. She jumped and clenched around me.  
“When I’m done, you won’t be able to sit,” I promised her. She moaned at me in response, and I struck her again. “Shut your mouth. No noises.”  
“Bite me, asshole.”  
I didn’t need to be told twice. I yanked her up so she was kneeling, and drove my teeth deep into the shoulder I’d bitten last night. Blood flowed down her body and I continued fucking her into oblivion.  
I grabbed her jaw and spat her own blood into her mouth. “No. Noise.” She didn’t fight me this time. “Good puppet,” I cooed. It was in her best interest to did as she was told. I wasn’t going to be done with her for a long time yet.


	8. Nostalgia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some familiar faces make an appearance at Neibolt house, but one of them will never appear again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you thought this would end well for the loser's club, sorry. how are pen and vera supposed to have their happy end if the club doesnt die???

~Vera~  
I was content, for the most part. It’d been a couple days since Pennywise had hooked up the path for me, about a week since I’d come down here. My days were now a routine of bathe, play piano, dog through the pile of abandoned toys, read the few books I’d found in there, and smoke cigarettes. Here and there I’d taunt Pennywise. I was careful to stay by the piano when he ate. The sounds distracted me from his actions, and it masked the sounds of wet flesh being ripped from bone.  
Yes, I was mostly happy. But I became happier still when Pennywise strolled over to me, a big smile on his face.  
“Veraaaaaaa,” he sang jovially. I turned to face him. “I have something to show you.”  
I tilted my head. “This isn’t a gateway into sex, is it? Because that’s incredibly lame.”  
He snorted. “No, it isn’t. I don’t need gateways for that. I’d just rip your clothes off.” He waggled his brows.  
I rolled my eyes. “Alright. What is it?”  
Next thing I knew, we were out the front of Neibolt house. The sun was bright and I covered my eyes. The house was still as dilapidated and old as when I’d ventured down the well, and I wasn’t sure what Pennywise had in store. I didn’t like cobwebs. I looked at him questioningly, but he shooed me good naturedly. Sighing, I played along. I opened the front door, and it squeaked. The house was every bit as rough as I remembered but…There were less cobwebs. Almost none. Same with the dirt that was strewn about the place. The holes were still in the walls, floor and ceiling, and the place was clearly abandoned, but SOMEONE had gone to the effort to tidy it, and make it liveable.  
I rounded the corner to my left, and in there was a sectioned off living room. In there, everything was spotless. Old, and it matched the interior of the house, but I was all clean. There was a large bed in the corner and propped against the walls was my furniture from the house in the sewer. My heart warmed. He must have ported those in here while I was at the piano. There was also a lounging chaise, a small armchair, and even a little bookshelf for the books I’d managed to pry from Pennywise’s hoard. It was incredibly homey.  
As touching as it was, there was one thing I was worried about. I ran back outside, barely realizing Pennywise was gone. I unlocked my car, which was here from when I’d found the place, and grabbed my laptop and phone charger and trotted back in. I found a socket in my new room, and plugged the chords in and –  
Bless his evil little soul. He’d even hooked up electricity for me. I sighed in joy, thankful my parents paid for my unlimited data phone bill. It’d never make up for not wanting to know me, but I wasn’t going to look a free phone in the mouth and say no. Absolutely delighted, I hooked up my hotspot to my laptop. I immediately logged straight into YouTube and began catching up on my favourite channels. I couldn’t think of anything better.  
I heard a light jingle, and Pennywise was suddenly in front of me. He ruffled my hair.  
“One more thing, puppet.” I could hardly say no now. I followed him into another room, through the kitchen and past the swirling stairway that hugged the wall. In the next room over, there was the piano I spent my days at down in the sewer. Honestly, for a creature that murdered innocents, the guy had a big heart.  
I looked up at him, beyond pleased. I wrapped my arms around his big waist and breathed in the intoxicating smell that he gave off. “It’s great,” I said sincerely. Awkwardly, he rested one hand on my lower back, and the other atop my head. His had was heavier than I expected, but I didn’t mind.  
I pulled back slightly and raised my head as far as I could to gaze up at him. “You know, being tall is sexy and all, but sometimes I wish you were a little shorter.”  
“I don’t blame you. Are you even taller than 5-foot?” He snickered youthfully.  
“I’m five-two, asshole. I was going to be sweet, but you wanna be like that, cool.” I tried to extricate myself from his arms, but he didn’t let me go.  
“No, no,” he chortled, still in a good mood. “Tell me why you wish I was shorter.”  
I reached my hand up, almost having to stretch it out entirely to touch his face. “I can never quite reach you when I want to.” Desire darkened in his eyes, but I wasn’t quite ready to be manhandled. “How am I supposed knock you out when you annoy me?” I gestured about. “No tricycles up here to throw at people.”  
He frowned. “I said sorry.”  
“Yeah, I was joking, Pen. I’m not mad.”  
He gave me a gentle push and I made my way back to my laptop, gazing forlornly at the oven.  
“I don’t suppose…” I started, looking at him over my shoulder.  
“No,” he said. “You can make a fire outside. The fridge works, though. I’d also prefer if you used candles instead of the lights. The curtains will hide the glow. As for the fire outside – no one will bother you.”  
I was fine with all of this. I was going to spend the rest of my day happily watching let’s players scream at puzzles and players who were better than them. As I settled down to watch some John Wolfe, formerly known as HarshlyCritical, Pennywise sat beside me on the chaise. So he could see what I was watching, I propped my laptop up on the small coffee table on front of us. I then settled back into the chaise, which was surprisingly comfortable. I laughed here and there ant John’s sarcastic humour, and with the murderous clown at my side, I felt at home.

~~~

“Tell me. I want to know.” Pennywise was propped up against the chaise and I was between his legs, resting on his chest. I’d gotten the blanket from the bed; the autumn chill was seeping into me already. His hands absentmindedly carded through my hair, and I noticed with a small smile, every time he exhaled, a small noise came from his mouth. He was like a pit bull.  
“Why?” I asked sullenly. “It’s over. Way over. Nothing to be done now.”  
His had paused, then resumed again, this time not so gently. “There’s plenty to be done.”  
“Why do you care?” I huffed. “You eat children. And even though you didn’t rape me, you technically assaulted me.”  
“You’re right. I eat children. And I “assaulted” you.” The word make him snicker. “I don’t care if people rape others. That’s a delicious type of fear. I only care this time because it was you. Call it what you want, but I’m going to be honest.” His hands wrapped around my waist and he snuggled into my shoulder, whispering into my ear. “I’m jealous they got to have you before I did. How many men was it? Three? Four? I’ll find them. I always find them.”  
I leaned my head back onto his chest. “It’s not worth it, Pen, just drop it.” I didn’t think he was going to drop it, but he left it alone for the time being. It was darkening, so I made as if I was going to light a candle, making sure to close the curtains as I did. When I turned around, Pennywise was gone. I caught a flash of his costume vanishing around the corner, out the front door. I dashed after him, and when I saw what he saw, I didn’t really understand why the tension was so high.  
It was a man. A man in his thirties or forties, blue eyed with dark hair. He had a slight frame. There was another car parked across the road, one that I assumed to be his. Inside was a woman with red hair and big, green eyes I could see from here. The man had a hard look in his eyes, and thought I had no sense for emotion like Pennywise did, I could feel the hatred, thick and sticky, boiling off of the clown. Suddenly, my head clicked.  
“Bill?” I called out. The man looked at me, as did the woman in the car.  
“It can’t keep you here!” Bill yelled at me. “You have to fight it!”  
I tilted my head, but I didn’t answer. I didn’t need to, because another man, around the same age as Bill, walked around from the side of the house.  
“It’s pointless, Bill,” he called out. “I don’t know what’s going on, but she’s not here against her will. I saw it through the window. They were on the couch, cuddled up like it was vacation.” He spat on the ground.  
“Hiya, Richie!” Pennywise waved at the man.  
Bill looked at his friend incredulously, then at me. He couldn’t seem to comprehend it.  
“Whatever you think you know,” he started out, “it’s not true. It’s a LIAR. It feeds on –”  
“Fear, flesh, usually of the young?” I listed off in a bored tone. “I know more than you do.”  
“If you know, then why are you hugging with it on a couch?” Richie roared at me. “Are you insane? You realise just because it likes children doesn’t mean it can’t eat you, right?” He tapped his foot on the ground. If he weren’t part of the club that had tried to kill Pennywise, I might have liked Richie.  
“I’m fully aware of what HE is capable of,” I said in the snootiest tone I could manage.  
“And you have nothing to say about that?” Bill fired at me. When I didn’t respond, tears formed in his eyes. “It KILLED my BROTHER! He was six years old! And then it used his memory to taunt me! How can you stand there like it’s a normal person?”  
“I know what he did to Georgie,” I said softly. “I even saw his raincoat. The little boat too. Dreadful. Bad publicity for Pen here.”  
Pennywise played along; he pouted, and his shoulders drooped. “I was never the same after that,” he moaned forlornly.  
Bill was looking at the two of us like we were mental ward patients, his expression a mix of horror and disbelief. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Richie making some shady movements. I had a feeling he was going to try something funny. There was a long-ish plank of wood by my foot that had broken off the house. The end was sharp, and it was bent enough that if I needed it I could flip it into the air with my foot. I kept close by it.  
“Aw, you shoulda seen it Bill. It was like a Midsummer Night’s Dream. It was playing with her hair and then it got real close and whispered in her ear, and was kinda GROSS you know? But I couldn’t look away, like that time when we were young and we saw Eddie’s mom getting dressed, like you want to look away but you CAN’T because you’re just so horribly transfixed – that was me watching them on the couch.” Richie shuddered.  
“Hey, asshole,” I called out to him. “I know your eyesight is clouded by those thick ass glasses I’m sure you haven’t bothered to change since you were like twelve, but in case you haven’t noticed, the tables have turned. I don’t need fear to kill you.”  
He guffawed. “And what can a tiny thing like you do? You gonna hug me to death?”  
I tossed my phone at him and he caught it. “Probably something like this.” I’d opened up a picture of Miranda’s remains. I saw Richie shudder and he tossed the phone back to me.  
The woman in the car got out to join us. Pennywise waved at her, too. “Oh, hello to you too, Bev. Such a nice little gathering. Would you all like to come inside to eat?” He snapped his teeth. Beverly didn’t even blink. Pennywise’s disposition turned mournful. “Sadly, you’ll have to die first. You’re the one least afraid of me.”  
She stepped forward and Pennywise actually retreated a step. She smirked a smug grin. “After all these years, still thwarted by a girl. Aren’t you just a big disappointment. And as for you,” she said, turning to me, “I don’t know why you’re here but it doesn’t look like you’re on our side. You should leave if you don’t want to get hurt.”  
I picked up the wooden plank on the ground. “I think it’s you who should be leaving, Bev.”  
She laughed. “What are you going to do with that? An old, rotten piece of wood isn’t going to do much. What say you, boys? Shall we gather the Loser’s Club once more?” She turned to face them. “After all,” she said turning to face us again. “I’m sure Eddie wouldn’t want to –”  
I’d had enough of her arrogant tone, and from what I’d just learned, she was the biggest threat to Pennywise. Pity she didn’t know how I felt about threats to my murderous, dancing lover. I knew that speeches were people’s downfall. If you were going to do something, just do it. So I did. As she faced us again, I drove the wooden plank into her neck, watching the wood splinter and break. It didn’t matter. Blood bubbled out, slowly at first, then the stream thickened. Her hands flew to her neck and her eyes widened in shock, and fear. Pennywise inhaled deeply, strength flowing into him from the scent of the dying woman before us. Satisfied, I watched her crumple; the damage was done. Richie and Bill screamed and attempted to charge us, but Pennywise broke a chair and handed me another plank.  
“Now, now, boys,” he tittered. “Play nice, or you’ll end up like dear Bev down here.” Beverly was clawing at her throat, and blood was bubbling out of her mouth. All I could hear was gurgling and sniffling from the two men in front of us. How easy it was to break the spirit of someone. One minor detail, the death of their friend, and their lights were snuffed out, like candle flames starved of air. I laughed darkly to myself, gaining a new understanding of Pennywise. This was certainly fun.  
The made to run to the gate, but it shut, trapping them in the yard.  
“Now that you’re here, you’re easy pickings,” Pennywise sang happily. He opened the door to the hose and gestured grandly beyond the doorway, as if he were inviting people into his loving home for the first time. His voice deepened, gravelly, laced with threat. “Shall we take a walk down memory lane?”


	9. Pennywho?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pennywise and Vera go out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a bit of a filler while I lay out the rest of the story, but I think it's kinda cute. I must feed the fangirls.
> 
> You all know The Middle by JEW (haha) so here's the other song if you're interested.  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qxlbfd0yaA

~Vera~  
As grandiose as Pennywise’s display was, the two men weren’t so easily thwarted. They dashed around the side of the house and made their way out through a massive hole in the fence. Like, it was fucking HUGE. I couldn’t believe Pennywise could manage to kill thousands of people but fail to remember a giant fucking hole in the fence.  
Richie turned to face us as he left. “You two are fucking toast! Eat shit, clown-fucker!” He flipped me off and they drove away. I looked over my shoulder to Beverly’s very dead body. Pennywise hadn’t moved.  
“Did you know that hole was there or did they seriously just outsmart you again?”  
He snorted. “I knew it was there. I want time to toy with them. Thanks to your little attack, the Losers Club is now in disarray, to say the least.” He sighed happily. “You can’t imagine how good you look when you kill people.”  
“Don’t,” I said as he made to grab Beverly’s body. “Don’t eat her. Put her on the other chair over there. She can be a reminder for when those assholes come back. And anyway,” I added darkly. “She doesn’t deserve a burial. Not after what she did to you.”  
Shrugging, Pennywise did as I suggested. With one last glance at her gaping neck, I went inside. She could stare at the ceiling with those glassy eyes until she rotted.  
Back inside my “room” so to speak, Pennywise was faffing about with the ruffles on his sleeve. I looked at him, an idea springing to my head.  
“They won’t be back today, will they?” I queried.  
He shook his head. “No. They’re humans. They’ll want time to mourn their precious cunt in the front yard.”  
I sidled up to him. He looked at me sideways, a small smile curling his lips. He knew I wanted something.  
“I want to get drunk,” I informed him.  
He sighed. “Cigarettes and alcohol. You’re not really looking out for yourself, are you?”  
“Like you give a rat’s ass about that. Just… just let me get sloshed, okay? I’ve killed two people in as many days and I just want to let loose.”  
He looked at me incredulously. “Let loose? Vera, I think murdering people in cold blood is letting loose. And I murder people all the time.”  
I shrugged. “Then you should have no issue.”  
Again, he sighed. “What do you want?”  
“No, no,” I protested. “I want to go with you. It’ll be nice to get out. Plus,” I tacked on, “it’ll be fun. Like a daaaaate.”  
He raised a quizzical brow at me. I looked back expectantly. He gave in. rolling his eyes, he exhaled. “Fine. Go get dressed.”  
I playfully punched his arm. “Aw, thanks Pen, you’re the best.”  
I quickly slipped into some jeans and a singlet. Looking at myself in the mirror after typing my hair into a high ponytail, I realised with some amusement, I was kind of dressed like a greaser – just without the leather jacket. I laced my Docs up and headed out the front door. Pennywise was there, in his human disguise. I thought back to how I thought his façade was forgettable. Maybe it was because it was dark in the sewer, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. Human Pennywise had a jawline that could cut steel, full, plump lips with a perfect cupid’s bow, and a nose that was adorably upturned. I smiled inwardly. His nose looked exactly the same when he was Clown Pen. I also noticed his eyes weren’t quite blue; they were somewhere between that and green. Lovely.  
He wore a plain grey t-shirt and some faded black jeans. The look was completed with a black button-up flannelette that hung loosely over his frame, and some brown loafers that looked like they mimicked designer. He was a little bit shorter, but he still towered over me. I liked Human Pen. I wondered if he’d let me fuck him like this.  
He pulled out some sunglasses and popped them on, handing me a smaller, similarly shaped pair. Clown Pen was definitely my favourite but hell if Human Pen wasn’t a sight to see.  
“Look at you,” I mused. “You’re hot.”  
He smirked and slung his arm around my shoulder in a strangely human gesture. To anyone else, we’d look like… well, a normal human couple. “Ready to go?” His familiar dialect rolled out of his alluring mouth, but it was a little different. It rose in different places.  
I shook my head. “We aren’t teleporting.”  
“Then how are we getting there?” he asked sarcastically. Tell me how someone can have a sexy voice.  
I shook my keys at him. “Driving. You might be living in 3017, but for the rest of us, cars are the epitome for transport.” I grinned and pressed the button, and my baby beeped. How I’d missed her.  
“Well, I guess. I can’t die so…”  
I shot him a dirty look as he made his way over, tucking his hands into his jeans. Even his walk was suggestive. I was definitely going to have to fuck him as a human. I got into the driver’s seat and buckled up. In seconds, we were driving. I turned the volume up, pleased to hear one of my favourite CD’s in the stereo. Call me old-fashioned, but I liked CD’s. I wound my window down, snickering to myself about how absurdly normal this was, driving down a normal road with another “human” in my passenger seat. The soothing sound of Midnight Sky by Petit Biscuit flowed through my speakers, and my mood was higher than it had been at the festival. I could easily pretend I was just out with my boyfriend. In fact, I would.  
In my periphery, I could see Pennywise (it was still so weird to think of him as Pennywise when he looked like that) nodding his head in time with the music, one of my cigarettes in his mouth. I held my hand out, and he lit a second, and handed it to me. I breathed in the toxic air, ridiculously euphoric.  
I voiced my thoughts. “I can’t think of you as Pennywise while you’re like that. Does your human persona have a name?”  
“Not really, no. You can think of one if you like.” He raised a leg and braced it on my dashboard. I grimaced. So rude.  
I pulled into a car park outside of the liquor store and grabbed my wallet from the glove box. I had to lean over Pennywise to get to it, and he buried his nose in my hair and breathed in. Flushed, I pulled away.  
“Can you refrain from doing that here, especially when you look like that.” I cleared my throat.  
He slid his glasses onto his head and grinned at me. Somehow, his smile was still dark and malevolent. “How much do you like this camouflage?”  
“Eh, I’d give it a solid nine out of ten.”  
“And the clown?”  
“Nine point five.”  
His brow furrowed. “Not a ten?”  
I climbed out of the car and grinned at him over the roof. “Well, that depends. Can you one-up it?”  
He raised a brow. “Is that a challenge?”  
I didn’t answer. I headed into the store, thankful the weather was cool enough that the air conditioning didn’t need using. I was tossing up between whiskey and vodka, but my sweet tooth got the better of me. I could mix vodka with so many more flavours. I snagged a big ass bottle and some mixes. I wasn’t going halfway tonight.  
Making our way to the register, I had a question for Pennywise. “You act different in this form. Is that part of the camouflage?”  
“Not really,” he replied. “With each form I take on, there’s a different feel. When I change into something, it’s not me becoming the form I’ve chosen. It’s more like the form becomes me. I don’t really have a form you could understand with your human brain. So the ones I take on, I really have to BE them. Each different one has a flavour, a style of its own. I’m surprised you picked up on it.”  
I stopped walking. “You must think I’m an imbecile. Yeah, I noticed that when you’re the dark yet weirdly attractive clown, you’re super murderous and nasty and strangely affectionate in your own way. And yeah, I noticed that in human form you’re insanely sexy and WAY more chill and, well, human.”  
“Didn’t you listen to what I just said?” he asked as we resumed walking. “This form is human, so it’s infused with humanity. The clown is, well, more child-like. It’s there to attract children AND scare them. Odd that it would attract you.” He ran a hand through his dark, ashy hair. Idly, I noticed Human Pen didn’t smell like cotton candy. He smelled musky and boyish and tangy. Equally as appealing.  
I loaded my haul up onto the counter and the woman there looked at me uncaringly. “ID?”  
“Uh, yeah.” I fiddled around with my wallet for a second and she sighed.  
“Don’t bother. You could murder a kid in front of me in this shithole and I wouldn’t care.” She scanned my items, and I glanced at Pennywise, holding in a burst of laughter. If only she knew.  
I paid for my things but I wasn’t ready to leave yet. I dumped the bags in the backseat and went towards the grocery store. I had a sudden craving for ice cream and other foods that my body would hate me for. As we ambled through the aisles, I noticed women checking Pennywise out. I slid my arm around his waist and hooked my thumb through his belt loop. Yeah, I was jealous, and yeah, it was petty, and no, he didn’t actually look like this, but it made me feel good. The reason fuelling this sudden contact wasn’t lost on him, and he chuckled.  
“Jealous, are we?”  
“Uhh, yeah. They’re all staring at you.”  
“Of course they are. This one is designed to attract women. I have a sexy lady form for men too, if you’d like to see that.”  
Actually, I would. Men, women, I wasn’t picky. “Do you have a form for everything? And are you male or female? I mean regarding where you come from.”  
“Neither. I just… am.”  
Like that didn’t give me a whole new bunch of questions. Sighing, I left it alone. I didn’t think I’d get much out of him.  
I purchased my haul of snacks, only slightly guilty about delving into my college funds. I wouldn’t be going anytime soon. On the drive back, I refilled my tank, but the trip remained otherwise uneventful.  
“You know,” I mused on the way back inside. “I considered Penley. For your name,” I added when he gave me a blank look. “But I also like Bill.”  
He raised his brows. “Bill. As in the same as the Bill who thought he could kill me a couple decades ago.”  
I waved my hands. “Forget that rat. You LOOK like a Bill to me. Or a Penley. I’m not sure which yet. You can be Pen for now.”  
He shrugged, unbothered. I put my groceries and began hitting the liquor.  
“Already?” Pen asked. He looked at my phone. “It’s three in the afternoon.”  
“Mhm,” I verified. “Want some?”  
“I’m not human, Vera. It won’t work.”  
“Ah, but you said,” I crowed triumphantly, “that you’re more human in this shape. If that’s true, you’ll be affected, right? Maybe not as much as I am, but you WILL be affected.”  
One corner of his mouth raised into a lopsided grin. “Oh, look at that. She pays attention.”  
I tutted. “Told you I wasn’t stupid.”  
I poured us both a drink, ready to get absolutely pissed. I was feeling nostalgic, so I pulled up The Middle by Jimmy Eat World on my phone. We all went through our angsty, rebellious teen phases, and I was no exception. Feeling merry, I belted out the words at the small table in the kitchen, trying to make sense of the weirdly hot not-guy in front of me, sipping on the liquid fire I’d just bought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The reason I haven't settled on a nickname for Human Pen is because I wasn't sure what you guys would like. If you haven't made the connection, Human Pen is a Bill Skasgard doppleganger (love his face too much not to include him soz), but I didn't know if that would annoy you guys with there already being a Bill in the story, or if you guys wanted me to stick with a name that was similar (Penley is an old, old English name) to Pennywise. Only problem is, most male names starting with "Pen" are pretty fucking lame. And I don't want Vera unironically calling him Pen. Just yuck. Imagine fucking Bill Skarsgard and calling him "Pen." I THINK THE FUCK NOT.
> 
> Let me know if you'd like to see more of Human Pen. Don't worry, I wont replace Clown Pen with him, but I thought it might add a bit of depth to his character. Please note, none of this is canon. Some of it stems from things I have heard, which may or may not be true. I really couldn't tell you. As always, hope you enjoy.


	10. Mine.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pennywise knows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO SO SORRY FOR HIATUS. Life got in the way and I got some writer's block. Back in business, my dudes.

~Human Pennywise~  
The problem with being in my human shape was that I was much, much more susceptible to, well, all of the things that made humans, human. If I’d been asked what makes someone human, I probably wouldn’t use Vera as an example. She had a dark strain inside of her. Not every human could kill remorselessly the way she had done.  
No, if someone asked me what made a person human… I’d say compassion. Narcissism, crippling fear of being alone, looming mortality, but above all else, compassion. No other species I’d ever seen had the capacity for empathy the way a human did.  
I knew she’d deny it, but she was drunk. Her pale face had a flush across her cheekbones, her eyes were glazed and unfocussed, and her movements were cumbersome and delayed. Her words blended together, and she was finding mirth in some ridiculous things, but I could hardly stop her.  
One of the best things about being human was how my perception changed. If I were the clown right then, sure, I’d still be amused, but it would be more at her expense. When I was more human, I was able to see beauty, and looking at her through my new eyes, I was struck with just how delightful she was. But having said that, the fact she should even get through to the clown at all… she was special. Very, very special.  
She tottered over and plonked onto my lap. I could still smell her tantalizing scent through her skin as she struggled to focus her eyes on my face. She had been right. The alcohol had affected me, but she was smaller than me, and a real human. I was quite honestly, on very slightly tipsy.  
Unsurprisingly, I felt feelings of warmth from not only myself, but her, when she made contact with me. When humans were drunk, their feelings became amplified, yet warped, like if someone had turned up the sound of a guitar amp too much and the sound came out distorted. Regardless, feeling her affections was in turn raising my spirits from pensive to joyful.  
“What can I do for you, my murderous little puppet?” I rested my hands on her waist.  
She sniffed that tiny, delicate little snort she saved for when I said something she found darkly amusing. “You’re a Penley,” she said firmly. “I mean, Bill really, really suits you. But… I like Penley a lot. It’s quirky. It makes sense.” She trailed her hands down my chest. “I’d like to get Penley out of his clothes. Do you look as good underneath them as you do right now?”  
I caught her hands in mine. “You’ll have to forgive me. I’m a little… to preoccupied with the people who are back in town.”  
She huffed and sifted her fingers through my hair. She leaned into my ear and her next words sent chills through me. “We’ll kill them. Every last one. And I know how.”  
I turned my head towards hers, slowly, lips ghosting her cheek. “And how are we going to do that?”  
She sat back and gazed at me, her eyes oddly clear in her drunken haze. She began speaking, and with each word, she painted a picture for me, a picture I had been waiting to see for twenty-seven long, long years. I didn’t sleep after I was attacked by Bill and his friends. I had not eaten enough, so my rest would not come. She wove a tale for me, one in which I could see each of their deaths so painfully clearly that my ears rang and my chest swelled with affection. I would keep her for the rest of her life. And I would make sure she would live an eternity. I would make her just like me.

~~~

~Vera~

When I woke, I was pleased to find I had no traces of a hangover. I was incredibly thirsty, but aside from that, I felt fine. I rolled over to see the familiar eyes of Penley, half lidded, but not entirely closed. I went about my normal morning routine, but this time, I decided to use the shower. The bathroom was spotless, and I’d picked up my favourite scent of soap, as well as hair care. My daily cleaning done, I ventured back downstairs, and to my surprise, I was greeted with Penley; not Pennywise.  
He didn’t look at me as I sat on the floor in front of him. He just puffed on a cigarette. After a time of silence, I spoke.  
“Are… are you alright?”  
“I’m tired.”  
“Well, yeah,” I said, tapping his raised knee playfully. “You don’t sleep. But, doesn’t your twenty-seven-year thing make up for that?”  
He raised his gaze to mine, and I was shocked by the apathy I saw there. “I’m so tired, Vera. So very, very tired.” I made the mistake of blinking, and before me, sat Pennywise. “They robbed me. They robbed me of my rest, my recuperation, and my life. I was supposed to sleep for twenty-seven years. Do you know how long that is?” He tilted his head at me, and I was, for the first time in about a week, afraid of him. “I was down there, alone. Unable to sleep, unable, to eat – unable to die,” he said in a mock-sad tone, and his gloved hand found mine. “I lay in that pit, with my treasures, alone. They STARVED me, Vera.” His lower lip was jutting out in a hurt, exaggerated pout. “Do you know what laying in the same spot, too weak to move, too weak to eat, for twenty-seven years does to you?” His hand was tightening, and I felt the circulation to my hand start to cut off. Yes, I was scared of this new, forlorn Pennywise, but I was also sorrowful. I hated Bill, and I hated his friends. I was glad I’d rammed a splinter through Beverly’s neck.  
“You couldn’t imagine how very rabid I was when you came to me. You were the first person I’d seen in almost three decades, and you looked delicious. But then, you weren’t afraid. Not at first.” His eyes were glowing and I was trapped in them. “I wanted to eat you. I wanted to hear you scream and beg for your life as I took it from you. So I planned it. I wanted to do so many awful things to you, Vera.” His hands slithered across my cheek. “But then Miranda happened. Beverly happened. And now, you want to kill them all. With me.”  
Pennywise rose and drew me up with him. He sat me on the couch and crouched before me, his nose on mine. “Remember when I told you that my human form was infused with humanity? This one is… not. It’s dark and it’s cruel, it wants what it wants, and it’ll do whatever it needs to take it.” His eyes bore down on me, searching. “Tell me, why didn’t I kill you to get what I wanted? Why did I stop? Why, even in this body, do I still continue to want you alive? I should have ripped you apart the moment you stepped foot into my den. But…” he raised a finger as a pause, as if he were giving a show. “I didn’t.”  
He stood up and took one of the glasses I’d bought and threw it against the wall. “I don’t know what you’ve done to me. I feel – I feel tight, I feel warm, I feel like – like –” He turned to me, chest heaving.  
He crouched before me again, his eyes remarkably soft, his gaze tender. “Let me…” he ran his thumb along my lower lip. “Let me make you mine. Forever. We’ll wander the sewers, we’ll live here, we’ll terrorise the town, we’ll take whoever we want, and we’ll LIVE.”   
I shivered involuntarily. The imagery he presented, however wrong it was, I wanted it. “But I’m human,” I said sadly. “I will die one day, and my bones will rot, and I will turn to dust.”  
He smiled wickedly. “No. You’ll be mine. I’ll make you mine and you won’t ever die. I’ll never be alone again.”  
Goosebumps were popping up all over my body. “How?”  
He pushed my legs apart, toying with my underwear. “Say yes.”  
I shook my head, trying to distract myself from his hands on my hips. “Tell me how.”  
His thumbs hooked my nightgown and pushed it over my head. “Say yes.”  
I tried to push him away but he was too heavy. He rose and pushed me onto the chaise beneath him, pinning me. “How am I supposed to say yes if I don’t know what you’ll do?” I asked breathlessly.  
His head found its way to the crook of my neck. “Say yes. You’ve given me you fear and you’ve given me your body. Give me your life, and give me your soul, and you can dance with me until the end of time.” Somehow, I was naked beneath him, and I was already craving him. I knew he was manipulating me, but it was working; I was powerless.  
“Will it hurt?” I gasped out as I felt something big and warm between my legs. He forced his way into me, but I couldn’t move.   
“Yes,” he murmured into my ear. “It will be agony for every moment until you come back to me.” He pulled almost completely out and paused.  
In again. “Why… why would I want that?” I choked out. He was taunting me so badly I wasn’t even listening to his reasoning.  
Out. “Because you’ll be with me forever,” he tempted. In again. “I know how you feel. I feel it every time you look at me, every time you think of me, and I feel it when you kill for me.”  
This time, he didn’t tantalize me. The chaise squeaked in protest as he moved his body against mine, and my hands broke the skin on his back. He didn’t bite me, he didn’t hit me, and he didn’t hurt me like every other time. All he did was pin me, and whisper in my ear.  
“Say yes, say yes, say yes.” He chanted it like a vow, a rite of passage that would grant him is desires. I didn’t answer, and his hand snaked between our bodies and began rubbing where the rest of him could not reach. My mind went blank as I embraced the coiling in my stomach, and he continued his verbal assault.  
“Say yes to me, Vera, and I will never be alone again.”  
“Y-yes,” I choked out. “Yes, I will be yours.”  
His thrusts became harder. “Mine. Say it.”  
“Yours,” I breathed, for my lungs had run dry. “Only yours”


	11. Still Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Losers meet a very remorseful Vera.

~Richie Tozier~  
I gazed around at the people in Mike’s living room, hearing, but not really listening to their plans. All I knew was if you weren’t afraid of the clown, you could kick it’s ass. That was all I needed in my memory bank.  
Coming back to Derry was… well, it was a clusterfuck of everything all at once. We didn’t know that when we left, our memories of the child killer in the sewer would fade. Mike had called us up, each and every one of the Losers Club, and though we had no memory of the thing he was warning us about, we somehow all knew. Deep down, we knew exactly what he was talking about.  
I stared at the two empty chairs, where Beverly and Stanley should have been. Stanley was always the weak one. We all loved him, but he was never cut out for this kind of life. Sorrow had blanketed us the day we’d received a call informing us he’d taken his own life. Though we were not permitted to read the note he’d left on the walls in his own blood, we could take a guess as to what he’d written. And then there was Beverly, as always, far too ahead of herself, overlooking the new, small detail that we could never have planned for.  
The girl. I had no fucking clue because seriously, every time I looked at It I wanted to gag, but this girl was just… treating it like it was a fucking human. I just couldn’t wrap my head around it. How had It gotten her to stay so willingly? And why hadn’t It eaten her? Sure, she was older, but it’s not like she was putting up a fight. Flesh is flesh, and I didn’t think a thing like It would be fussy when it came to “meals”.  
“Richie. Richie!”  
I blinked and looked up at Bill, momentarily sad. He’d worked so hard to erase his stutter and he’d done so well, but the second we’d crossed back into Derry, it had come back at full force.  
“We n-n-need a plan.”  
“Well don’t look at me,” I said. “I’m just as fucked as you guys. First Stanley, now Bev…” I looked over at Eddie, remembering all of the jokes we’d cracked at each other as children, remembering how I’d fucked up his arm even more when he’d broken it at Niebolt house, and how he’d somehow gotten over his hypochondria, even if only for a matter of seconds, to kick that clown in its fucked-up mouth. “If you die, Eddie, I’m going to walk my ass over to death’s gate myself and punch you in the teeth. You’d deserve it for dying on me.”  
“Beep beep, Richie,” he mumbled at me. It was a little joke we’d had as kids; I’d say a joke and they’d say, “Beep beep” as a sarcastic response. It was appropriate as my jokes were always a little ill-timed. Though an allusion to our days as children enjoying our lives, the throwback was sombre and chilling. Neither Stanley nor Beverly would ever chastise me for my jokes again. Hell, the last time I’d heard it was when that thing had said it to me in a room full of clown dolls.  
Mike, Bill, Ben and Eddie had gone remarkably silent. None of them were even looking at one another. Frustrated, I threw my hand up and slammed them on Mike’s table.  
“Are we really going to let it win?” I demanded. “We’ll have time to mourn for Beverly and Stanley when we put his seven-foot dancing ass in the ground! We’ve done it before. We can do it again.”  
Ben shook his head sadly. “Beverly was always the bravest. Without her, we’re useless.”  
“Don’t forget about Stanley,” Bill snapped. “He was one of us j-just as m-m-much as Beverly was.”  
Ben balked. “I wasn’t trying to say –”  
“Y-yes, you were, Ben, we ALL know –”  
“ENOUGH.” I turned to Ben. “Just because YOU never got over your stupid little crush on Beverly doesn’t mean we can’t do this. She wasn’t our backbone. We were all part of this. And YOU,” I said, stabbing a finger at Bill. “Don’t turn this into some stupid show of male rivalry and dominance over her. She was never interested in either of you stupid assholes, and she’s dead. Maybe if either one of you had manned up and TOLD her how you feel, you wouldn’t be so filled with regret!”  
Everyone stared at me. Bill was chewing on the inside of his cheek, his nostrils flaring in his rage. Ben’s eyes teared up, his hands bunching up into fists by his side. I didn’t back down.  
“We are ALL sad,” I said firmly, “and we will ALL miss Bev and Stan until the day we die. But if you two think you have it harder than the rest of us, you’re not the Bill and Ben I know. We are all mourning their losses. ALL of us.” I rubbed my eyes behind my glasses, remembering vaguely how the girl who was holed up with It had called them old fashioned. “Sassy little bitch,” I muttered to myself, then continued. “We cannot afford to be divided now. We may have been children, but it took all our strength to beat that thing last time. We’re now down two very valuable people. It’s going to be like walking through hell and back if we want to stop this once and for all. Can you guys handle it?”  
Slowly, I looked at them all. Eddie, as always, had my back. He knocked his knee into mine under the table, and nodded his head. Mike, Bill and Ben all gave their approval, and I continued with my train of thought.  
“Now, I’m sorry for being so harsh but honestly I can’t win this on my own. I mean, if it were a competition for who out of all of us is the best looking and has had the most pussy, I’d win for sure, but it’s just not like that,” I said sadly. To my relief, they all sniggered, muttering some variation of “fuck off.” I sighed inwardly. Our numbers may be dwindling down, but I had hope.

~~~

~Eddie Kaspbrak~  
I didn’t want to do this. Every bone in my body was screaming at me to leave, but I knew I couldn’t. It just made it all that much harder.  
“Aw you have to be JOKING!” I heard Richie moan. “Don’t tell me they’re using Bev to play house. I’ll fucking kill that bastard.”  
I looked over to whatever he was seeing and almost threw up. It had only been 2 days, but Beverly had already begun to rot. She was seated on one of the chairs on the porch, with a sigh attached to her that said, “If you try, you die.” I almost began hyperventilating when, even at the (somewhat) safe distance I was from her, I saw maggots crawling out of her eyes, and flies buzzing into her mouth. She didn’t deserve that.  
“Th-that’s what It wrote on the wall when he t-took her the f-f-first time,” Bill said, unable to look away.  
Wordlessly, Ben walked into the house and emerged before we could follow. He threw a long, white sheet over Beverly so she was hidden. He turned to us, anguish so, so clear in his eyes. “We can’t bury her,” he sobbed. “Not until It’s gone. It’ll just dig her up and eat her.”  
“No, he won’t” Richie said, cleaning his glasses on his shirt. “If It was going to eat her, It would’ve done when she was fresh.”  
“She’s a message,” Mike concluded. “A warning for us. It knew we would come back. What better way to mess with our heads than to see our friend denied rest?”  
I shook my head. All I could think about was E. coli and other coliform bacteria that could worm their way into me from Beverly’s intestines. I wanted to kick myself. I was about to have a panic attack. Fuck this town. As soon as we set foot back here, my hypochondria had come back in full force and I was a mess.  
You can’t imagine my shock when Richie came up and pelted me across the face. I fell to the ground, and I decided I wasn’t shocked at all. Richie was never delicate nor tactful.  
“Thanks.” I tried to say it with sincerity but it’s hard to do that when your head is reeling. He was about to say something smartass back to me when something at the front door drew our attention.  
“Oh, fuck me sideways and call me Betty.” Richie was looking at the young woman in the doorframe with seething hatred.  
“Is that her?” I asked.  
“Her, as in the one who probably has clown-boy’s child inside her? Her, as in the one who murdered Bev in cold blood and laughed about it? Yeah. Can’t imagine what it’s like to date her as a normal person if It likes her enough to keep her around.”  
Something wasn’t making sense. Richie was talking about her like she was wildly evil, but her eyes were wide and she radiated fear. To me, she looked like any other terrified person who’d had the misfortune to stumble across the clown.  
“I-I’m so sorry,” she choked out, tears rushing down her beautiful face. She was in a white T-shirt and dark jeans. The shirt had bloodstains and claw marks all over it, and the jeans were torn and dirty. “I didn’t want to! It does this thing where it… it gets into your head! It took my anger at my parents and directed it to you guys because you were like a family! I didn’t want to kill anyone,” she pleaded with us. Her eyes were clear and unclouded. “I never meant to hurt anyone.”  
Mike pondered. “Remember what happened to Henry? He always hated us but you know he’s in a psych ward now. Talks about a clown who told him to kill people. Sound familiar?”  
Richie wasn’t buying it. “What about that picture of the girl on your phone? The one you made a brain smoothie with?”  
“I didn’t do it!” she insisted, her hair flowing about her face. “It was all the clown! I was supposed to be part of his plan, to kill you all and never be bothered by you again. He hasn’t eaten in three days! He’s weak, and his control is slipping. I’ve been waiting since yesterday for you to show up. Please, you have to stop him!”  
“Stay h-here.” Bill really never could say no to helping someone. “We can do this.”  
The girl looked at him in horror. “I can’t! My fiancé is in there too! I’m not leaving without him.”  
I sighed and looked at everyone else. “Look, I don’t know about you guys, but it seems reasonable to me. I’m not saying we trust her, I’m saying it doesn’t look like she’s lying. Let her come along. Pat her down if you have to.”  
Richie looked at me like I was nuts. “She KILLED Beverly!” He roared at me. “I don’t care how pretty she is or how long it’s been since your wife fucked you – she’s a killer!”  
I shook my head and walked up to her. “I’ll kill you if you do anything questionable. Got it?”  
Tears were falling freely from her eyes. She nodded, and sniffled. “I just want to find Penley.”  
It was odd, I thought, as we all made our way inside. Stanley, we had all accepted would never come with us. It was hideously ironic, however, that Beverly could die, and we could walk into Niebolt House with the same number of people as we would have before she died.


	12. Never Be Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The club falls for Vera's ruse and pay dearly for it.

~Vera~

I’d tried to sleep, but I just couldn’t. I had no clue what I’d agreed to, but I knew it was hardly small. All I could hear was Pennywise’s guttural growl in my ear, asking me to say yes, over and over again. As I let Bill lead the little party I was now part of, my tears weren’t entirely false. I was scared. Pennywise would tell me nothing of what was to come, and the only thing I remembered was him telling me I would be in agony. I was willing to admit I cared for the clown, but agony? If he said it was painful, it must be. He’d had his head caved in and hadn’t batted a lash. I was shaking. Yes, I was scared, but I was grateful. At least it added to the façade I had to present to my companions.  
We made our way into my room. I’d covered the furniture in cobweb-ridden sheets and moved it all around in a haphazard fashion so it didn’t look so cosy. None of them even noticed.  
“Would you quit your whining? I can’t even hear myself think.” Richie snapped at me pointedly. “You really sound like Eddie’s mom that one time he told her his pills were, what was it that you told us, Eddie? Gazebos? She really doesn’t like being told no by her precious little Eddie. Wonder how she knew what you meant.”  
I turned to him and mustered a deranged look. “Listen here, you thick-headed walnut, my fiancé is in here somewhere. That THING used him as leverage against me. If I were to run, Penley would have… he would have…” I began sobbing, and Eddie shot Richie a dirty look.  
“Hey, it’s alright. We’ll find him, and you guys can go. You won’t have to worry about the clown.” Eddie was really the key here. He swallowed my whole story. I realized I liked him, and I wondered if I could persuade Pennywise to let him live. Not Richie, though. I wanted that bastard deader than Miranda.  
“I can’t leave without him,” I said softly. “He’s all I have. That – that clown – he took everything from me.” Upstairs, laughter echoed down to us. Pennywise was chortling like a mental patient, and I heard a thud, followed by a grunt. Then, I heard Penley’s voice float out.  
“Don’t – Don’t! Stop, PLEASE!”  
I took a deep breath, hoping to God I sounded convincing. “Oh, you gigantic, five-headed ASSHOLE, I’m going to fucking rip your EYES OUT!” I felt my throat scrape painfully as I pushed my way through the five men around me and rushed upstairs. All but Richie just kind of stared, but he was hot on my heels. I needed to get rid of him, and fast. I pulled open the door to the bathroom, and a second later, Richie joined me. There, on the floor, was Penley. He had a giant gash in his head and his hands were dirty. His eyes were rolling into the back of his head, and though I knew it was an act, my heart bled for him.  
I rushed over to him. “Where is he? Did he hurt you? Are you alright?”  
He didn’t speak, he just pulled me into his arms. Shortly, the rest of my group joined us and stood around awkwardly. I used this to speak. “They’re going after it, and so are we. There’s no way I’m leaving here without seeing it dead with my own eyes, and I’m not going without you.”  
“Vera, you can’t –”  
“Yes, I can. That thing threatened to kill you, he wanted to fucking eat you. I’ll make sure he never eats another thing again.”  
Penley and I stared at each other, until he finally conceded. He turned to the other men in the room. “He’s underneath the house. There’s a way to get into the sewer, it’s a –”  
“A well,” said Bill firmly. “We know. We’ve been here before.”  
Penley stared. “Why?”  
Eddie shuddered. “Twice, we’ve been here. The first time I saw It was here. He takes on your worst fears. He came at me as a leper. Then when we came as a group, I fell through a hole in this hallway and broke my arm. Then the time after that – we thought we’d killed it. I’d really would have preferred to forget and stay out of this stupid down than come here a third time,” he tacked on, kicking the floor.  
“Oh, boo-hoo, you broke your arm. Only person in the planet to ever have that happen,” Richie shot at Eddie.  
“YOU made it WORSE! I TOLD you not to do it, you fat-headed ass!”  
“Oh, how could I forget?” Richie snapped, rolling his eyes. “All you had to do was sit still, but you were having a fucking panic attack. Do you even know how high-pitched your voice was back then? I still hear you in my nightmares, screaming, ‘Do not fucking touch me!’ It was horrifying. Like a dolphin.” Richie squeaked at him.  
Eddie just stared, and I felt bad for him. Richie was incredibly unbearable. Penley laughed a short, incredulous laugh and stared at Richie. “How can you joke when that thing is here?”  
Richie shrugged. “It’s what I do. I’m here all week.”  
“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” I moaned. “Are we gonna kill it or not?”  
Bill, who was obviously the leader, suddenly sprung into motion, like he’d forgotten why he was here. It seemed everyone was transfixed with the weird relationship that Richie and Eddie shared. I’d never seen anyone as scathing as Richie get along with someone as well-meaning (and hot-headed) as Eddie. It was an interesting dynamic. Pity I’d be ripping it apart soon.  
We went down the well, and clambered into the angled pipe to make our way to the heart. Bill was asking me questions in hushed tones.  
“Why’d it take you? You’re not a kid.”  
“It said – he said I was pretty,” I hiccupped. “Said it could use me for things it couldn’t use kids for.”  
Richie snorted. “What, so it can eat children, but it has a problem with touching them like your average Uncle Joe? Bullshit.”  
I sobbed a little. “The fear isn’t as strong in kids. They don’t understand what it’s doing where a grown woman – every woman has a fear of rape. It said it could taste it from yards away.”  
“Oh, I’m not going to pity you,” huffed Richie. “You don’t deserve it, you insignificant little worm.”  
Eddie punched him in the arm. “Look, man, you don’t have to like her, and I know, she killed Bev, but seriously? You sound as cruel as the thing we’re hunting. Don’t be an ass. You shouldn’t downplay abuse.”  
“She’s a fucking liar! I don’t believe a word of it! Why the fuck would It need any sort of sexual gratification? It doesn’t make sense! So, excuse me if I’m not going to take her word for it –”  
“You took Bev’s word when she told us what her father did.” Eddie’s voice was quiet, but it rang through the sewers as loud as a gunshot.  
Richie shoved Eddie against the wall. “BEV was our FRIEND. One who’s now DEAD thanks to that bitch there.” He stabbed a finger in my direction without breaking eye contact with Eddie.  
I stepped forward. “This… this is what It wants. You’re fighting. Please, you can condemn me all you want when it’s dead. We can’t afford to be divided now.”  
Richie released Eddie and looked at me incredulously. He opened his mouth and the closed it, before finally speaking. “‘We,’ huh? You’re not one of us. You don’t get to talk like that. We were divided from the start.” He waved his hand at me like I was an annoying fly, and shoved his way to the front of the group. Eddie looked over at me, and again, I really wanted Pennywise to let him live. I liked him a lot.  
There was a sudden yelp, and I turned behind me. Penley moved as if something dragged him backwards into the pipe behind us, and I screamed. I went to chase after, but Bill grabbed me.  
“I know where he will be. Don’t follow. That’s what It wants. I’ll take you to him.”  
I made a show of staring at Bill, like I was trying to see if he was sincere or not. Slowly, I nodded. Through the filthy water we paced, until finally, we made it to the centre. There, in the middle of the hub, was Pennywise, seated at the piano, playing one of the songs I’d taught him. He’d become proficient in a very small amount of time.  
He grinned at us over the open top and stood, walking to the side of it. “So good to see you all again. Especially you, Vera. Might I say, you look absolutely delicious. How’s your arm?”  
Richie looked suspiciously at me and I touched my shoulder as if I had done so unconsciously. Richie honed in on the small movement and ripped my collar aside, revealing the chunks of skin Pennywise had torn out. Eddie, Bill, Mike and Ben all saw, and Richie, who had been nothing but an asshole to me, swore and stepped back.  
“Where’s my fiancé?” I screamed.  
“Oh, you mean this guy?” With a chuckle and a blink, Penley stood beside the piano. “Come give me a hug, darling.” In another heartbeat, he was back to Pennywise.  
“What… what did you do to him?” I wept out brokenly. I deserved a damn Oscar for this performance.  
He laughed and pointed up. We all gazed up and saw one lonely, long body floating of its own accord, orbiting the massive mountain of his spoils. I looked back at Pennywise and he pushed his fingers to his lips. Like I was enraged, I charged at him, but one swift (restrained but believable) backhand sent me sprawling.  
“Don’t test me, Vera. You’ve brought these cockroaches into my home, but I’ll allow you to live. Until I find a prettier toy than you.” He leered at me. “Now,” he said, and his voice permeated the large room we were in. “Who wants to float first?”  
The men were readying themselves to fight, but I knew it wouldn’t work. I was still afraid, thinking about what I had to do next. The anticipation jittered up my spine and I didn’t move. The head blow was an excuse to remain stationary for a moment. All of a sudden, Pennywise had me in his grasp, slipping a knife into the back of my jeans while his had wrapped around my throat.  
“Ah, ah,” he said jovially. “This one – you can’t even begin to fathom how scared of me she is. You’re not touching me this time.”  
I squirmed but he restricted me further. Bill was looking at me in horror, and Pennywise laughed again. “I’m s-s-sorry,” Pennywise whined at Bill. “Remember when it was you in this position? I’m not letting you all walk away like I offered last time. You’ll die here, and you’ll float too.” I swore I heard the echo of a young boy’s voice as he said those last three words. I looked up and moaned. The five other men followed my example, and mimicked my noise of dismay when they realized Beverly’s body had somehow joined the decoy that was supposed to be my fiancé.  
Pennywise laughed again. “Who’s ready to play?” He shoved me at the group in full force, and I used to momentum to slam my brow into the first person I made contact with – Mike. We tumbled to the ground, and without missing a beat, while the others rushed at Pennywise, I buried the knife he’d given me into Mike’s neck. Almost immediately, the he rose, not even dead, slowly rising to join the others above him. Wiping my knife on my shirt, I called out to Pennywise.  
“Hey, Pen, do me a favour?” I called out as I saw him quickly snap Ben’s neck. He wasn’t fucking around with fear this time. He was using his otherworldly advantages to pick them off one by one.  
“What’s that, puppet?” Bill, Eddie and Richie were staring at me, the former two with betrayal, the latter with hatred.  
“Let Eddie go. I like him.”  
The trio were still in shock as Ben’s body rose, so Pennywise used this time to respond to me. “I can’t do that,” he argued. “He’ll come back. I’m not doing this again.”  
“Please?” I asked sweetly. “He was the nicest one. You can kill Richie, though,” I said, smiling at the smart ass.  
Pennywise sighed. “Fine. He can leave. The other two? Not a chance.”  
Eddie was staring at me like I was a monster. Maybe I was. Maybe not. It didn’t matter. I would be soon.  
Bill and Eddie rushed Pennywise, while Richie came at me at full force. I saw a punch coming, and turned my head with it to take the brunt of it away. I stumbled but found my feet, dancing away from his seething hands. Pennywise must have noticed I wasn’t really getting anywhere, because he made a high-pitched cackle, and Richie was momentarily distracted. I wasn’t about to play fair; I used the opportunity to run at him and kick him with all my strength between his legs. He buckled immediately, throwing up, tears flowing from his eyes. I had about twenty seconds. I looked wildly over to Eddie and saw him and Bill still tag-teaming Pennywise. I ran over and grabbed Eddie’s arm.  
“Can’t you see what’s happening? Go! You’ll die!”  
“I can’t just leave!” He screamed at me. “You lied to use! This is your fault!”  
Beside us, Pennywise had grabbed a fistful of Bill’s hair and pinned his arms. Bill looked at Eddie imploringly.  
“Go. There’s no sense staying.”  
Eddie looked at him, then me, the Richie. Then, big, heaving sobs wracking his body, he dashed out of the pipes. I sighed in relief. He was someone I’d feel genuinely bad about killing. I turned to Richie, who was still on the ground, panting in pain. I made my way to him, looking at Pennywise. He forced Bill to watch me, and Richie gazed at the knife in my hand in fear. He tried to move, but I hit him in the temple with the hilt. I didn’t expect it to, but it knocked him out. I looked over at the clown again, fear rearing its ugly head again.  
“You’ll watch every second of this. I want to feel your despair, and I want to taste you as the hope flees your mind.” Pennywise looked at me.  
“Are you sure about this?” I asked. This was it.  
“More than I have been about anything.”  
I took a deep breath. I began to cry. I didn’t want to do this. But I had to.  
I made sure not to look at Pennywise when a bright, incandescent light lit up the sewer like a supernova. He’d told me whatever I did, I was not to look at him. Slowly, I shoved my knife into my favourite sheath, Richie’s neck. His eyes flew open in shock and fear, and I grinned evilly.  
“Beep beep, Richie,” I smirked at him, and Pennywise guffawed. When I was sure he was dead, I began cutting into his skin. Bill was screaming stunted obscenities at me, but the light was too bright, the ringing in my ears was too loud, and the blood beneath my hands was too warm. I couldn’t stop now if I wanted to.  
After an eternity of hacking at flesh and breaking apart bone, I separated his heart from the rest of his body.  
“Eat the heart, free the dark. Embrace the fright, bathed in Deadlights.” The words meant nothing to me, but Pennywise had drilled them into me. With no more hesitation, I tore into the heart, gagging on the metallic taste that had a bitter, acidic underlay. Each time I chewed, the lights glowed brighter, and my head began to ache, my stomach cramped up like a thousand bees were inside stinging me, and my skin felt like it was melting.  
I sat there, barely able to contain the pain, determined to finish the organ. I was exhaling vocally, animalistic growls coming from my throat and through my nose, but I couldn’t stop. I didn’t want to. There I sat, in the sewers of Derry, eating the heart of the dead man below me, awash in the glow of my evil, inhuman lover, while delicious, hot licks of pain invaded my body. Again and again, I screamed, unable to hold the agony, but I didn’t stop. I would finish this.  
He would never be alone again.


	13. Fragile No More

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera is... not Vera anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning. If you're troubled by young children being maimed and killed, maybe skip this chapter.

~Vera~

Floating. I couldn’t think, I couldn’t breathe, but I vaguely realized, it felt like I was floating. My body was light, laced with the most intense, exquisite pain I’d ever tasted, but it was like… like I wasn’t actually feeling it. Second hand. I was either having an out-of-body experience, or I was heavily depersonalized.  
Yes, I felt like I was floating, but I could feel cold, damp floor beneath me, and I was grateful. The unwelcome chill was a distraction, something I could focus on while my body was ripped apart from the inside out. With dismay, I realized that with every second, I was becoming more and more conscious, and the pain was becoming more intense. I began writhing, desperate to expel the torture, but there was nowhere for it to go. It was stuck inside me.  
Though the pain remained, my mind went blank, and my breathing became shorter. Shorter. My throat was contracting, and wildly, I realized I couldn’t get enough air into my lungs. My hand was still on the knife, and I knew that if I could move properly, I probably would have killed myself. I didn’t want to suffocate.  
As my throat tightened, tears leaked out of my eyes and pooled around my ears, joining the damp floor. I was trying to speak, but the words were lost in a mass of gurgles and keens. After what seemed like an eternity, I realized I couldn’t breathe, but I didn’t actually need the air. Distantly, I felt a hand on my head.  
“Come on, Vera. You’re not giving in already? You promised to be mine.”  
I knew that voice. It was a voice that elicits fear, gave me joy, sent chills down my spine. It was a voice I had come to care for, one that was above all other, but I couldn’t match a face to it. I’d forgotten, or at least was too distracted to remember, what the owner of that face looked like.  
My fingers clutched the knife before it was removed from my grasp. My head was lifted and placed on something soft. Silk? It was smooth and bore little friction, not that it would have mattered. I wouldn’t have felt it.  
The lap my head was on was cool, much like the floor, and a welcome counter to the fire in my veins. The voice spoke to me, reassuring me, and though I couldn’t make sense of the words, I felt oddly soothed. Large hands brushed my hair out of my face, and suddenly, I could open my eyes. As the light blinded me, I squinted, waiting for my eyes to adjust. When they did, my body froze, taken aback at Pennywise looming over me. I soon relaxed, still very confused.  
I tried to talk, but the words wouldn’t come. The fire in my veins had died and come to rest in one spot: my throat. It was like layer of sandpaper were scraping against one another, and I clawed at my throat. It was too much. I looked wildly at Pennywise, unable to comprehend why I was in so much pain. He looked at me, strangely happy.  
“You’re hungry.”  
I tried to speak, but dry coughs and echoes of whispers were all that would come from my mouth.  
“Don’t try and talk,” Pennywise advised, strangely gentle. “It’ll be over soon.”  
I heard a whimper, and cowering into the mountain of toys was a little girl. A strangled noise floated over to me, and I saw Bill roped to the rocking chair I’d spent so many days on. He was staring at me, then the little girl in horror.  
“You need to RUN!” he shouted at her.  
Pennywise laughed darkly. “You’re just making her more afraid, Billy boy.” He turned to me, excitement in his unhinged, yellow irises. “Can you smell it?”  
I sat up, all of my attention now on the child before me. She was six, maybe seven. She was very cute. Big, green eyes, and a halo of golden curls framed her swollen, terrified face. And she smelled… incredible. She gave off a fragrance so unique and phenomenal, I wouldn’t be able to put it into words. It made the hunger in my stomach gnaw at my insides, like a demon baby eager to claw its way out, regardless of the consequences to the person’s womb it took residence in. I stood, hunched, trying to find any sort of position to alleviate the pain. Nothing worked.  
I staggered over to the girl, grimacing with each step and it sent jolts of pain through my entire body. She was visibly shaking, but I couldn’t stop walking even if I’d wanted to. The girl couldn’t look away as I advanced. I finally came close enough to touch her, but I didn’t. She squeezed her eyes shut, big, tearful sobs shaking her tiny body. Vaguely, I wanted to spare her. I wanted to let her go. But I wanted to eat her more.  
I brushed her hair across her shoulder and she flinched, her crying cut short in her panic. I drew my arm away, and, without touching her, I leaned in and breathed. I felt my eyes roll into the back of my head and the delicious, tantalizing scent wafted into my senses. I pulled her towards me, running my tongue along her cheek. She was shaking so hard her teeth were chattering, and I loved every second of the anticipation that rolled off of her.  
I pulled away and looked her in the eye. I stroked her cheek, and oddly, it seemed to calm her a little. I turned us around a little so I was facing Pennywise. Holding the girl against me in faux comfort, I managed a small smile. Then I looked at her, finally able to speak. Her eyes widened again as I said the last words she would ever hear.  
“It won’t hurt for long.”

~~~

~Pennywise~

She moved with molten grace. She had always been a wonder to watch before, but now… now she was quite literally otherworldly. Though she was stooped over in pain, she oozed an ethereal aura that demanded attention. The little girl was terrified, rightfully so. She didn’t know how lucky she was, to have the beautiful huntress before her as the last sight she saw. She would be the first witness to Vera’s prowess.  
Vera’s small, pale hands, which had grown paler still in her change, brushed the little girl’s hair aside with a tenderness that rivalled a woman’s maternal instincts. It made her all the more alluring, for I knew, had they even existed before, those instincts were now long gone. The child flinched and Vera leaned in, and delicately inhaled the scent coming from her, like a food critic at a renowned establishment. I wondered with excitement if she would be a gourmet. Imagine the quality of what we’d be eating.  
Vera pulled the child close, and ran her tongue along the child’s cheek. The small human was visibly shaking, and the scent was extraordinary. I was amazed by Vera’s remarkable restraint. It had taken me many awakenings to learn to regulate my hunger, to enjoy the game. I had been rabid, unable to restrain myself from tearing my victims apart without culture. She was a natural, and my chest swelled with pride at being her sire.  
She pulled the child into a close embrace, turning them both so she could face me. She grinned wickedly at me over the human, and it was that moment I knew, one hundred percent, I could not live without her. I was transfixed, enchanted. In that moment, I knew I’d follow her wherever she went.  
She looked at the child again, cupping her small face. Amazingly, she was able to speak, and underneath the raspy tones of her dry, dry throat, I heard a voice that, with her metamorphosis, sounded just like she had before, but mimicked jingling bells.  
“It won’t hurt for long.”  
In one swift motion, her jaw split open and disconnected, latching onto the child’s shoulder. A primal growl erupted from her chest as the child screamed, and blood splattered the floor like a renaissance painting. I heard music in my ears, I saw sunbursts implode, I felt euphoria. Somehow, in the daze of her first feeding, Vera looked me in the eye, and I saw her familiar, icy irises glowing a liquid gold identical to my own.  
With a guttural groan that was almost a roar, she tore flesh from the child. Idly, I noticed a small, small hand thud to the ground, either from shock or blood loss. Vera tossed her head back, red staining the lower half of her face, and her clothes. To my utter disbelief, a moment later, she had efficiently removed the lower half of the body and lobbed it a small distance from her. Releasing he feed, she patted the ground near her, those luminescent eyes beckoning me over. I complied, marvelling yet again. She could control her hunger, she could play with her food, she could even tear herself away to split the meal – not one of my kind had ever been known the share before.  
My kind didn’t move in packs. We were all over this world, and the next, and the next twenty after that, in our own territories, and we didn’t step on each other’s toes. The only way we could die was by the hand of another of our kind, so we didn’t push our luck. We didn’t breed; as shapeshifters, we were all asexual and could reproduce on our own, should we desire to. We didn’t have paternalistic instincts; we only expanded as we assimilated more planets. Very, very few of us were created, as opposed to born into our species. So few species could handle the transformation. Humans were among the weakest of them all. If Vera ever was presented with the opportunity to meet more of my kind, she would be a walking wonder.  
She was done waiting. She tore into the girl’s torso, wet sounds flooding the sewer, yet not loud enough to quiet Bill’s cries. With no more hesitation, I joined her, our grunts and growls adding into the mix of sounds that was music to my ears. Still warm, crimson life flowed into my mouth, accompanied by the tangy flavor of young, untainted flesh. Humans drank alcohol, they smoked, they took drugs, and if enough was ingested, it could ruin their taste. Children were pure and unpolluted. A perfect source of nourishment for creatures like us.  
When we were finished, she threw herself onto her back and gazed at the floating bodies above us.  
“Is it always that good?” she asked, absently nudging my hand with hers.  
“It never gets old,” I said lowly.  
She stretched, and I heard her joints pop. “I want more. How much do I need to eat?”  
“Infinitely. The hunger will never stop.”  
She sat up and focussed her attention on Bill. “Why is he not dead?”  
I shrugged. “I haven’t decided how to kill him yet.”  
She flopped back down and closed her eyes. “How long have you been like this?”  
I joined her. “Longer than I care to remember. Long days and long nights, and long slumbers, all stained with unwelcome feelings of loneliness. I’m glad you made it through. I’m not sure what I would have done if you’d died.”  
She laughed good-naturedly. “I suppose it’s not something you’d try very often.”  
“No,” I said, frowning. “It’s not.”  
She rolled onto her side and faced me. “Will you tell me how it works?” Absently, I realized though her eyes were still blue, they were speckled with golden flecks.  
I looked away. “Not today.” I wasn’t trying to be secretive, but I was troubled by my attachment to her. As stupidly cliché as it sounded, the fact that she’d lived made the word I’d always despised a very palpable reality. Cases of transformation were rare, but not only because of the low survivability rate. Because my kind was so vindictive and, for lack of better word, evil, whatever had made us the way we were had played an awful trick on us. We could reproduce on our own, but the circumstances had to be very, very specific. We could make more the same way i had changed Vera, but again, very situational. How ironic that I, a creature so fuelled by hate and spite, would have to love something to make it just like me.


	14. Pennywise and Parsi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera gets her very own camouflage!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the delay guys. I have been incredibly sick these past few days. I'm still recovering. Thank you all for being so patient.

~Vera~

We were back in the house. I had, over a few weeks after the incident with the Losers Club, cleaned the place up to look liveable. The outside was still dilapidated and kinda scary, but the inside was now comfortable. Most days were pleasant. Today was not.  
Pennywise was in a state of utmost tension. He was pacing, muttering under his breath, cursing in languages I’d never heard before, and when I tried to approach him, he just snarled at me and continued his tirade. I was stung by his callousness, and my emotions weren’t made any better by the fact that I was always starving.  
I wasn’t sure exactly what had happened, but I knew I was just like him now. I found myself wondering why, if he was so lonely, he hadn’t tried this with someone else before. Try as I might, he refused to tell me how it was done. I’d nagged him for days to tell me, and I wasn’t about to stop now.  
“Are you ever going to tell me how you did it?” I fired at him again, laying on the kitchen bench.  
He paused and glared at me. “Would you stop asking me the same thing time and time again? I’ve told you no.”  
I pouted. “I don’t like being told no.”  
“Get used to disliking what happens, then, because I don’t say yes often.”  
I sat up. “Look, I don’t know what has you in such a foul mood, but if you could, maybe, not take it out on me, that’d be nice. Being nasty for no reason isn’t how you keep people in your life.”  
He threw me another dirty look. “I didn’t ask you to be here.”  
I raised my brows. “Oh, so shall I leave then? Maybe I’ll find another murderous clown to spend my now eternal life with? Do you know where I can find one? Preferably one better looking, and nicer than you, because maybe then he’ll –”  
Pennywise roared in frustration and I thought briefly to myself, maybe I’d been a bit too petty. Unfortunately, there was no tricycle in sight, so he snagged one of our misshapen dining chairs and pegged it at me at full power. Instead of moving, however, I just stood there, unmovable, and it broke around me. Rather than being pissed, I was momentarily struck by how I’d barely felt it.   
He stared at me for a moment, then his shoulders sagged. “Why are you so tiring?”  
I shrugged. “If you won’t tell me, help me figure out how to make a camouflage like you do.”  
“Will you stop asking me if I do?”  
“No, but it will distract me for a while.”  
He rolled his eyes. “What do you have in mind? A particular look?”  
“Uh,” I mumbled. “No? That’s what I need help with.”  
He huffed. “You want something that will both intrigue and scare your victims. For now we can focus on one shape, which will be aimed at one demographic. As you get better, you will be able to shift more, yes?”  
I nodded. “Seems reasonable.”  
“Alright. I suggest children first. They’re the easiest to bait, therefore, you will be eating more often.”  
I frowned. “But I have no clue what will make them curious enough to get near me.”  
He sniggered and walked toward me. “Look at me. I’m not exactly child friendly, but they still come. Don’t think too hard.”  
I tapped his nose. “You’re plenty likeable,” I teased. He caught my hand and spun me so my back was against his expansive chest.  
“Close your eyes and listen to me,” he breathed in my ear. Shivering, I did as I was told. His hands rested on my shoulders, then traced their way to my hands. “Feel where my hands go. Imagine the shape they are tracing. You are malleable. Soft, like clay. You will take some work to be shaped, but it is possible.” The hands traced back up to my shoulders, to my neck, then down my back. Next, he gripped my hips and outlined up to my breasts, then back down again. “The hands you will use to sculpt aren’t palpable. It’s all in your mind. Look hard enough, and you will see little lights inside yourself. You need to brighten them, and as you do, your body will become softer. Almost too soft. You’ll feel like you’re about to melt – and that’s where you want to be.”  
His voice was so gentle that it lulled me into a pseudo trance. As he continued to trace my body, I could, in fact, see lights behind my closed eyes. With each stroke of his hand on my shape, they would light up and link, like connect-the-dot puzzled for children. Before too long, I saw myself, in a version of a reverse-silhouette. Just as he told me, my body became sort of heavy, and my skin felt… detached? No, not quite. It felt like… like rather than being fixed to my bones and muscle, it was held there by a small centre of gravity that pulled towards my centre. It wanted to stay there, but if I willed it hard enough –  
There. The lights outlining my body flashed on, and I could see myself. Dressed exactly as normal, in a camisole and shorts. My face was paler than normal, my hair was still long but it wasn’t quite right. It took me a moment to realise, but it wasn’t brown. It was blacker than anything I’d ever seen before, blacker than the void I’d floated in to become what I now was. I pushed harder, and I felt it in my skin, a warm buzz that tingled all over, and the projected image of myself became devoid of all colour. Black and white. My skin lightened, devoid of all pigmentation entirely, and my newly coloured eyes began to glow.  
My head tingled, and my hair grew past my mid back, down to my waist. Instead of loosely waved, it was now choppily cut, and dead straight. Suddenly, I had a very clear image in mind, and I knew how to draw the children in just as Pennywise did. I could hardly be a clown – one was enough. But I could be something complementary.  
I traded my outfit for an outdated, Lolita-type black and white dress, partially reminiscent of maid-wear. I matched it with torn stockings, shiny buckle shoes, and a small, ribbon choker. I was quickly getting the hang of this camouflage thing, so I tried my hand at texturing my skin. I gave it cracks and strokes, and at my joints, I fashioned pretend nuts and bolts. I made it look hard to the touch, but kept it soft. I brought forth two black lines from the edges of my lips down my chin, and painted my lips in a heart shape, to appear smaller than they really were. I enlarged my eyes, and smattered freckled across my face. Thinking more about minute detail, I lengthened my nails to sharp points, and placed ribbons around my hands and ankles. If I willed it hard enough, I could move them like extensions of my extremities. When I was done, I opened my eyes and looked down. Astonishingly, my skin was white, I was donning the outfit I’d imagined, and, grabbing a fistful of my hair, I saw it was black. I turned and looked at Pennywise, thrilled with myself.  
“That was amazing!” I declared.  
“Step back. Let me see.” He looked troubled.  
Uncertainly, I made my way into the kitchen. “Did… Did I do something wrong?”  
He tilted his head. “No. In fact, you did it so well, I’m beginning to wonder if you were born specifically to be like me.” A frown grazed his disproportionate features and I laughed.  
“Don’t you like puppet Vera?” I asked. “I need a name. Can’t have people knowing who I am.”  
He smirked. “Do you know what Pennywise means?” he asked.  
“Yeah, it’s like being careful with spending money, right?”  
He clapped. “Exactly! You should pick a name that matches.”  
I grinned slyly. “Sure. Why don’t we get matching necklaces and shoes while we’re at it?”  
He looked at me, puzzled. “Is that some sort of odd human custom? Occasionally I see it. Never made sense.” I giggled, and he smiled darkly back at me.  
“What about Parsi? Short for parsimonious,” I suggested brightly. “It’s practically a synonym for yours.”  
“Hmm.” He approached me. “Pennywise and Parsi. I’ll admit, it has a nice ring to it.”  
I threw my arms around his neck and, realizing what I wanted, he lifted me off the ground so I could hug him properly. “I need a parlor trick. You have one. Your balloons. I want something neat like that.”  
He ran his cherry nose along my cheek. “Isn’t that what the ribbons are for?”  
“No, no,” I disputed, “those are just part of the outfit. I want something separate.”  
He set me down and sat on the chair he didn’t break. “It has to be something children like. It’s so easy to grab them when they’re taking a balloon from you.”  
“Not candy,” I said. “That’s way too cliché. No one will fall for it.”  
“You’re right,” he approved. “Something else.”  
I thought to myself. Puppets were often associated with stages, puppeteers (obviously), and, I thought, music.   
“What about little music boxes?” I queried.  
Pennywise’s eyes lit up. “Yes! You could give them small boxes and plant disgusting illusions inside or pop out of them like jack-in-the-boxes, you could even have it speak to them!” He laughed manically, then picked me up again, spinning me around.  
“You are absolutely remarkable, you know that?” He sat back down and arranged me comfortably on his lap. “And,” he tacked on, “you look exceptionally good as a murderous marionette.”  
He was looking at me like I was surreal again, and it was making my mouth dry. How indescribable, to be the only thing alive to be close to him and not worry for my safety. How astonishing, to be the one thing on the planet to be looked at by him like I was some sort of goddess that he worshipped. I had no clue what it was that he saw worth venerating, but I certainly wasn’t going to do anything to stop it. Or so I thought. I was so caught up in my musings that what I thought I had said in my head, I had said aloud.  
“I’m ridiculously in love with you.”  
I’d never seen anyone so still in my life. I went from sitting on a warm body to sitting on fucking marble in a matter of six words. His mouth hung slightly ajar and his eyes were blazing into mine. Embarrassed and ready to hop into my grave, I squirmed, trying to get off of him, but he wouldn’t let me leave.  
“Say it again.”  
“I… What?”  
His hands tightened uncomfortable around my waist. “Say it again.” He looked at me with adoration in his eyes.  
I rested my hands around his neck and pressed my lips to his, marvelling briefly again at how neither of our faces smudged the other. “I love you.”  
With a primal snarl, my mouth was invaded by his tongue, and if I were still human, I surely would have suffocated. I bit on his lip and blood spurted into my mouth, delicious and completely different from human’s. Wildly, I realized I was now strong enough to be able to hurt him, and I knew right then that this was going to be the best sex of my life.  
He growled at me and bit back, and the heady, intoxication flavours mixed in our mouths, and it was heavenly. Better than any drug I’d ever taken. With a whoosh of air we were on my bed, far too close to each other, but not close enough. To my utter bewilderment, he paused the heavy kissing and looked down at me.  
“I’ve loved you since I tasted you for the first time. I don’t know what it is about you but I was never not in love with you. You’re the only good thing I’ve ever had.” Before I could even respond, his mouth was on mine again, and I lost myself to the sensation of his hands on me as our bodies tangled together.


	15. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter friends. I'm thinking of doing a second work (if yall would be interested), in a completely different setting - that's why it's left off without much explanation. I have some ideas, but feel free to shoot yours at me. The updates will be every few days as I am currently quite busy. Thank you for all of your support.

~Pennywise~

Stupid. So, so stupid. I shouldn’t have told her. How was she to know that my feelings for her only put her in more danger. As soon as this news reached others of my kind – and I had no doubt that it would, they had their ways – she would be a constant target.   
I paced around the sewer, furious with myself. Bill, still strapped to the chair I’d left him in, groaned weakly. I threw the first thing I could get my hands on at him. I wasn’t in the mood to play nicely with him as I had been doing so intermittently over the past week. He was missing an arm and a leg, and even an ear. I wanted to punish him, and I couldn’t think of a way more suitable to do so other than to make him watch me eat his own flesh.  
At the moment, however surprising, I was not hungry. I was scheming in a way I hadn’t needed to in a long, long time. I had to keep her safe. How ironic that I had given her immortality and made her more durable, only to have her in danger from the one thing that could kill her. Human transitions were few and far between, but there were some… elitists among my kind that would view her as dirty, lesser for having not been born the way she was. The thought made me livid; she was already far better at the game than any of them would ever be. Not even ten minutes had passed before she had built her first deception, and it was stunningly horrific. I was eager to have her try more, but I was unwilling to press her.  
I smirked to myself. Parsi for parsimonious. Clever little thing. It made me feel warm. I had suggested a matching name as a joke – partially – but she had happily agreed. She was such an anomaly. As a human, she was sarcastic, dry, passionate, wild, and she had a dark strain of something inside her that had made me want to peel her apart and see it clearly. With her transition, it had been exaggerated, blown up and brought to the surface. She was glorious.  
As if she had been called, she popped into existence beside me. She was in Parsi mode, and she glided along, still as short as ever, but somehow her limbs were impossibly long. Her hair glided over her shoulder as she looked at Bill, then at me.  
“Having fun?” She smiled happily at me. She was like a balm.   
Instantly, I felt a little better. “I don’t know what to do with him next.”  
She shrugged. “Let him rot. He’s got no hope of escaping now.”  
I frowned. “Eddie may come back.”  
She grinned. “I’ll deal with Eddie. I like him too much to let him get away again.”  
I scowled. “And what exactly do you plan on doing with him?”  
She threw her head back and giggled. “Aw, Pen, are you jealous? I don’t blame you, Eddie is VERY cute.”  
I growled. With her transition, she had also become nasty. I usually adored her when she was cruel, but it was never at my expense. I suddenly understood how she felt the day I’d thrown a tricycle at her.  
She pranced over to me. “I’m kidding. Yours, remember? Plenty of people would kill to be me.”  
I cocked a brow. “Meaning?”  
She toyed with the pompoms on my shirt. “Well, who wouldn’t want to be? I’m sure there are other people out there who like murderous, dancing clowns. That, and the whole angsty, angry guy caring only about one thing in the world…” she fake shuddered. “Saucy.”  
I ruffled her hair. “I still don’t understand you sometimes.”  
She frowned a little. “What’s bothering you? And don’t say nothing. I’m not stupid.”  
I sighed. “It’s complicated.”  
She raised her brows. “So talk.”  
I sighed. “Let’s go back to the house. It’s going to take a while.”  
It was about time anyway. She’d been changed for about a week now, and I was surprised to not have any unwelcome visits yet. She needed to be prepared for what was to come. I didn’t want her to have to deal with this, but she had to. All I could do was ready her as best I could. And I’d be there with her with whatever was to come.

 

~END~


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